Thanks Mama Red, Humlan and Chatty for your prayers and well wishes.

Orchid, you have hit a nerve with me. Quite frankly, I really am not sure what is the best for our granddaughter. You were so right about the identity thing, That will most surely come up. Obama was raised by his white grandparents, right? But from the reports I've seen, I think he identifies himself more with the Afro Americans. Maybe I'm wrong,…just seems that way.

Dotsie, how was it with your adopted children? How did you help them identify with their roots? Or was it even necessary?

"A" may even resent us for taking her away from her mother. This is what I most fear. What confuses me to no end is that the mother hardly did anything with her daughter;…not till she got a court order limiting her living quarters to where she lives now. My son was afraid she may "flee" with her daughter, she constantly threatened to do so. Only since then, -about 3 weeks ago, did she even show interest in her child. My son claims she is doing this just for show. But still, now the bonding is probably there…so I don't know what to think. Of course I would prefer their family to function and that "A" lives with her parents. But this is all out of our hands anyway. It's my son that wants to go this route. But if it should be decided that she return to us, - at this point, I know little "A" would be the happiest little girl in the world. When we do see her; she begs and cries to come back to her Oma and Opa.

Still, I am hoping that the marriage counselling may help. Do I sound confused? I am.