I know you were worried about this happening. It is terrible that she treats you like this. You have been raising her child so she could go off and "follow her so called dreams." she is such and ungrateful person, not to mention selfish. I think Chatty's right. You can't be the one to put her in her place, because you could risk her keeping "A" from you altogether. It is a mess. Of course the child thinks of you as her parents, you have been raising her. You have been the one who has been there for her, not her mother. I think keeping her away from you for 6 weeks is ridiculous and must have come from the mother. She'll want your "services" again when it suits her.

I saw, with my own eyes, how much that little girl loves you and you her. Your d-i-l owes you a lot. She's a very selfish woman.