My BFF has been in a gettin' ready for the step of divorce for the past four years. She's finally pushed to the wire and ready to go to that hard place, I hate it for her but she has to salvage her life, and I totally understand where she is at, the worry and anger and sadness and betrayal. Her husband has been adulterous and manipulating her due to her worry of security, and he was the one to say it's over,despite her trying so hard to work thru the rough patch (I give her so much credit for trying so hard!) . I have heard it all from her over and over and over, and been there every step of the way for her, knowing she needs the support of her friends especially now, , but I know I will have to step back a little while she gets her head in the right place. and she can become empowered and rescue her can I do that? She totally has my sympathy and empathy but I know she has to be developing some stronger aspects- she admits right now she is very needy and I'm ready to be there for her, always will...but she has to cope with different aspects, the first one being alone (which she can't tolerate at all), plus she has a difficult time managing the everyday stuff without a man around (and I always have, my DH has always worked away and I learned to cope, manage and take the reins when you have to). Please somebody give me some ideas at how to be supportive but not fostering dependency for her, she's treading water pretty hard right now and she don't swim!.