The idea of prevention makes us question why children do things in the first place. And this is where I think the approach has always been wrong. My friends and I, all in our twenties, have looked back and discussed the stupid things we did and why we did them. While every parent wants to believe the main issue is peer pressure, I can assure that was not the case with my friends.

While peer pressure may have been one factor, the main one was coping. We all used alcohol and drugs as a way to cope. As teeens we were experiencing many adult things without the adult mechanisms to cope. A teen finding out she was the result of a rape, a friend who lost a 21-year-old brother to cancer, one who had issues with self-esteem because of her changing body, another who was having troubles with romantic relationships. Just so you know, we were not the kids that would be labeled now and days as "at-risk" in the school system. We were all considered the "brainy" kids or the "good" kids. We were all lost and looking for ways to deal with what was happening to us and we did what children do, escape. And we did it the way teens, and many adults do it, through substances.

I think the best prevention you you can give your kids is to teach them to cope with the world. Do not trivialize a break-up, an "I'm so fat," comment, or that what you are going through in your own life (divorce, strained marriage, depression) is something that your children have to deal with as well. I know this is way off the mark of the original question, but I do think it is important to understand why many kids turn to such harmful and dangerous activities, especially when there are a million programs and messages telling them not to. Dealing with the real reasons kids turn to alcohol and drugs, is the only way prevention can work.

[ January 12, 2003, 07:05 PM: Message edited by: Candice Johnson ]