I am so sorry that this seems to be getting out of hand. Pre-wedding stuff can be the pits. Everyone is edgy and little things turn into a war. How odd that both sons are fighting....when one already has his wife's name and the other is about to do the same thing. Is this a protective thing for you and your husband (from your older son)? I do hope, for all of your sakes,that things will simmer down a bit so that the ones doing it will think a little more rationally. I do know bad things can happen.....my spoiled-rotten step-daughter denied her Dad the joy of walking her down the aisle less than two months ago....because he couldn't give the "right amount" of money toward the wedding. On her wedding day, he stayed home angry, crying and completely beside himself. It was awful. So, yes, I do know about evil young women and the control they have. So sorry, Hannelore, I pray it all works out. Keep us posted.