Two days ago my 86-year-old mother fell down a couple of stairs while leaving the dry cleaners. Thank God she didn't break anything, but her arm was scraped badly. There she lay, my poor Mom, and it took forever for her to get back up onto her feet. No one saw her to help her, which she later said she was glad of, because her wig flew off as well. She then immediately drove to our house, (Yes, she still drives) and Hubby and I doctored her wounds. I insisted she stay just in case she got a little shock from the fall.

My Mom is getting more wobbly from day to day. What peeves me is there is help for her. She has a fantastic insurance that covers everything including someone that would drive her, or at least accompany her to doctors, shopping, etc.

My mother is so afraid of losing her independence, which I can understand of course, but the truth is she needs help. Every time I talk to her about this, she gets upset and short of breath. I once read somewhere that one of the hardest things for the elderly is to recognize their own limitations, and in that case the adult children have to take charge. (She gave me power of attorney a long time ago).

I'm so torn about this. On one hand I respect my Mother's wishes and don't want to control her, but on the other hand I feel she is being stubborn and irrational. She has her senior moments as well, and they seem to be getting more frequent.

If she should break a hip or worse, I'm afraid I'll never forgive myself for not taking responsibility. My brother says if it upsets her when I suggest that she get more help, then I should let it be. Is he right? Has anyone else been in this predicament as well?