Occasionally I have wondered what if I was raised in a predominantly Asian society/culture instead of non-Asian, would my own positive self-esteem have taken this long to develop?

I know for certain, to become who I am and raised in North America in areas where the Asian community was nearly non-existent, means a child/teenager spends (wastes?) alot of energy/anxiety trying to conform/live up to expectations of coolness and rejecting anything that speaks/looks embarrasingly immigrant (foreign accents, strange clothing, foods).

On the other hand, if I didn't allow myself to be beaten down too much, you start to realize that you did survive through strange, tough childhood/teenage years that others just never underwent. Then you know you have a certain inner strength that you wish the younger generation would have experienced...and get this type of tough love /character-building.

part of the self-esteem development problems got muddled up with expectations from parents, who with good intentions wanted highly educated children, earning good salaries, living a "safe" life. And I wanted it too but it does mean muffling/delaying a pile of other unknown/latent skills and life experiences.

All of this made me a shy nerdy gal. My voice didn't speak out in crowds, meetings until I was in my early 30's. Unbelievable. Now I enjoy instructing and presenting to groups. I no ...longer...care...what ..other people think.