Men do think differently about this. And sometimes it's neccessary for them to get things off their chests before they can become friends. I don't fully understand it, being a woman, but my son was trying to explain this same thing to me the other day. Said all he had to do was fight 3 different guys to become top dog, so to speak. I was shocked, as this had happened in the past without my knowledge.
The way I think I understand would relate to the "pack theory" (like a pack of wolves, in nature) They have to determine who is the leader and then they can all fall into place with each other. I personally think it's crazy but they seem to have been doing this forever and it works for them.
Another thing they do, that we don't, is insult each other. I mean it seems to me that the closer they are to each other, the worse they insult each other. They call each other fat and stupid and still remain the best of friends. I mean if my good friend called me fat and stupid, I wouldn't consider her a good friend anymore! I don't get it but then maybe we women aren't supposed to get it... LOL

Sorry you had to deal with a tense situation Celtic but I think you handled it very well!