I've been pondering this topic. And while this might be slightly off-topic, I think it's interesting to note that on reflection I realized that my number one criteria for a husband had nothing to do with any feminist ideals, but revolved around washing the dishes.

I'm serious. Washing dishes was a HUGE issue for me. I had to do all of the dishes for a family of six (breakfast, lunch AND supper) all by myself every night (except my birthday) for nine years. Now there's where some feminist-inspired ideals might come into play...while I was in there doing dishes alone for two hours every night, my brothers were reclining in the living room watching TV.

I grew to HATE dishes with a passion. And I had no use for a man who expected me to do them (and any other housework) simply because I was the woman. It became imperative that any man of mine HAD to agree to help with the dishes...I refused to even consider a guy if it looked suspiciously like I'd spend the rest of my life washing his dishes...and I quickly ran the other way anytime any Christian guy started spouting Ephesians at me as justification for those expectations!

It took me 36 years before I met the man. Not only does he do the dishes, but most of the cooking, cleaning, laundry, ironing, and bathrooms as well...willingly and lovingly! I know, a man in a million. An incredible gift. And I know it!

Ironically, after my breakdown and enforced retirement, I had to fight with him (rage with him actually) to allow me to take over, or at least participate, in some of those household chores. Now we're much more of a partnership, and work very well and happily together. And I don't mind doing dishes anymore. As long as I'm doing them out of shared responsibility and not because I'm the woman.

[ September 16, 2005, 12:52 PM: Message edited by: Eagle Heart ]