Can you tell I have the empty nest on my mind?

While I'm preparing for this I've been made to think about women who will be facing this all alone.

So many women in our generation have raised their children by themselves and must feel a tremendous loss when their kids leave. It hardly seems fair.

they leave? OMG! When?

My brother is 46 and still lives at home with Mom. OK everyone, how do we spell D-Y-S-F-U-N-C-T-I-O-N-A-L?

Meredith, so your mom's how old and never been an empty nester?

Does your brother know how you feel about it?

What is it that makes adult children cling to their homesteads and roots? Any thoughts?

It must be so hard... although I know of some moms who are just wishing for the day they see their kids "out", so they can be alone...

I was just reading a magazine about raising chimps. It said the hardest part is setting them free.
I guess it's the same for kids. It's difficult for the parent and for the child, but it is also the culmination of the entire nurturing process.
Just like mother birds, sometimes we might have to kick the little rascals out, but being on their own is the only way they will ever be able to fly.

smile

I mentioned in another post earlier that if I had my way my sons and their wives and children and I would all live together in a huge roomy house as one big family. I hatethat they are gone and on their own, I miss them. I grew up surrounded by a big family, grandparents, aunts, uncles and my sibblings and it was heaven.. I miss it and my sons even though I see one of them often.....What happened to the good old days?

Chimps huh? Well, the way I see it I can either stop

1) buying those dang bananas
2) buy him an airplane
3) move...in the middle of the night
4) sell him
5) Give him to SMILES (what?)

JJ

Mom's 78. Philip was out for a few years but could never hold a job. He has serious emotional and mental issues that neither he nor Mom want to address. My two other siblings, who live on the East Coast near Mom, have been talking themselves blue in the face for almost 20 years trying to get her to kick him out. She says she wants to move to Florida where her friends have gone, but has made no effort in all this time. Philip has taken her car so she can't go anywhere except on the bus to the senior center. He takes her out "shopping" and "asks" her to sign credit card bills for his purchases. The three non-leech children use terms like "co-dependency" and "elder abuse" but Mom avoids all issues by retreating into depression. My other brother Howard and sister Iris have both offered to go with her to court to get some kind of injunction but she refuses. It's pretty serious and very depressing for the rest of us, but there seems to be nothing we can do unless she is willing to press charges.

Meredith: "elder abuse" seems an appropriate term for what is going on. Can you get some friend of hers to talk her into taking action???