that's so sweet Eagle... makes me wish I was married too.

Most of the time when the kids, grandkids, and other unsundry relatives are not here, Dan and I enjoy doing nothing together. Sometimes he gets on his computer and I get on mine and we send jokes and flirt online across the den.
Tonight we came home from church where they sing only those new 'praise songs' and put on a CD of old hymns and sang together (he sings well, I try). Sometimes we put on old music and dance. Sometimes I paint or write and he does some wood project. Sometimes we read. Sometimes he flips through the TV chanels until I go berserk and insist he stops then we watch Dancing with the Stars, Home Makeover, or PBS. Sometimes we talk. Sometimes we make love.

There's always things to do. Actually I think there's more to do when the kids are gone. At least a lot more you want to do.

And when the grandkids come along an empty nests can be a great thing. Dot's, you've got a lot to look forward to.

smile

I agree Dotsie; winter nights can be awfully long.
I found writing is a great way to spend my time…and then sometimes the nights aren't long enough. Same thing happens when I paint.
Usually during the week, Hubby and I go to movies or the theatre. Sometimes on weekends we get together with friends or family.
What's missing in my life is charity work. I used to work at Mass. General Hospital in Boston in pediatrics. I entertained the little patients there with puppet shows, reading to them and painting with them. I loved doing that. I know as soon as I retire, I will want to get involved in some kind of volunteer work again.
I don't watch much TV and my husband does (especially sport shows). Therefore we don't sit together evenings. But we do a lot of sports together and we love to travel. Actually the older we get, the earlier we go to bed and the earlier we get up. So we've turned into day people anyway, which automatically shortens the nights.

Crossword puzzles keep me very busy. Reading as well, but like you say...one can read only so much.

I work until after dark since my soap-making shop is next to the house....work until i drop since i love it so much!

Take a nice, long, hot bath too.

Can you find a friend you can visit to play some scrabble (NOT the on line kind!) When my Dad used to work nights and the four of us kids were in bed, Mom had a neighbor to play Scrabble or cards with. I wish i had a friend to play with.

DH and i play Cribbage sometimes three times/day. Why not take it up? It's addictive AND very good for keeping the brain thinking/active.

Thanks for all your thoughts and ideas. This is great. You've given me lots to think about.

JJ, your idea of cleaning out closets and getting organized is exactly what I planned to do once the kids left, but I can't do that since the surgery. This will change. I really want to have the house in tip-top shape when the kids come home for Thanksgiving. I think that's a good goal so that should keep me busy in a couple weeks.

Hannelore, I also want to give back a little. My husband is a mentor for a little boy at a local orphanage so I'm considering that, but it must be done during the day. My free time is really at night and they don't want you visiting the kids at night because it interferes with dinner, homework and their evening routines.

I do some of the things you all suggested already. I guess what I'm trying to do is find some balance. It's fun to be home some nights, but I don't want to be in Sun. through Thursday night. Part of this also has to do with the fact that I have a home office so I am not out and about during the day. One can only stay in so much.

We always get out on the weekend, either alone or with family and friends, or we have people here. I am a people person. Can you tell?

I guess what I'm learning in this empty nest is the fact that it's okay to relax. I'm learning to like it actually. Last night I watched an entire college football game with Ross. This is a first. Of course it was my son's college team that was playing so it added some interest.Usually, Ross and the kids would watch while I scampered about doing what I wanted to do. Now I like to keep him company.

If any of you have other thoughts, keep them coming. I'll let you know what I decide.

Dotsie, do you like board games! Puzzles! While visiting my grandparents this past summer in OK, my niece and I learned a new dominoes game - 'Chicken Foot' which is a real hoot.

During the cold winter, I like to order the Spring garden catalogs and plan (actually dream!) for the new season, nonetheless I find it enjoyable.

Its strange but single people spend time differently than the married people do at night. Been both and when married I devoted my evenings to my husband and his likes mostly. When he was happy, so was I. Since being single now which seems like forever, I love working at night. MY imagination kicks into high gear then and sometimes I can write until dawn. I also like to read the manuscripts I am working on at night. The only down side to that is if I happen to be working on one that is scary and really graphic I have nightmares. But that is a positive too because if it can give me nightmares, I know the readers of the finished product (book) will feel the same emotional excitements.... So you see, it matters whether you're single and have only yourself to please, or are married and trying to please and be pleased by your spouse. Which ever it is, just relax and go with the flow, life is too short to sweat the small stuff.

Chatty, such lovely insight and observant regarding married v. single. So true, more time for ourselves than catering to another. I look forward to your books! Although I cannot stomach scary/gory movies lately, a book in contrast I can b/c one can simply put it down and come back to it later!

You're right, Chatty. Singlehood has that advantage when it comes to long winter nights and one is still up. My ex treated sleep as a sacred thing and was a very light sleeper that any pottering around the house at bedtime greatly bothered him. So even when I was sleepless, I would lay awake at night itching to do things or even listen to music, which if I really pushed for it, I had to do with headphones on.