Need to get some feedback on those who've made a move to another state either to join children or just to relocate to enter a 55+ community. I need honesty on how you really feel about the move, particularly if it was a radical change, which would include leaving friends and family members behind. Do you like your new environment? Have you any regrets? Did you have a difficult time making the decision? How was the adjustment period? And woould you do it again if you could go back in time?

Scorpio115, Sorry no one seemed to see this post but here is my 2 cents....I lived most of my life in Indiana surrounded by relatives and friends and then got remarried and moved to Illinois but still only an hours drive from all my family etc. I lived there 14 years. After that divorce my sons and I moved to Colorado, both my sisters were there so that was okay to a point. We moved back to Illinois as the pickens were slim job wise where we lived in Loveland. After a year or so we moved to Las Vegas and for awile I was in heaven. I took a job rtransfer to a newspaper in D.C. for three years but wanted to be back in Vegas for the birth of my grandson. I began to notice that people were cold, indifferent there, mostly transients and no one really made friends in Vegas. I had no problem making the decision to move to Vegas and still love the climate. I miss all my relatives and mostly my mother. I had to think very hard about would I do it again and to be honest "I would not." I would stay in Chicago and be able to drive home whenever I wanted to visit my mom etc. I've been here now for about 16 years so this is home and here I stay. I am very involved in my community now and my kids lives. Luckily they are here and wouldn't don't to relocate. Its a big decision and can be a wonderful one. In a 55+ community you are more likely to make friends faster. There is always a period of adjustment no matter where you move to. I still prefer greener surroundings, lots of trees. Living here in a so called paradise is also stressful because everyone coming here for a 'vacation' wants to get together which is nice but difficult because I am not on vacation, I live and work here and I work alot of hours. I hate the strip traffic and avoid it at all costs. I've decided that anyone wanting to visit can come to me, off the strip, that would make it much easier for my limited time schedule and convenience. There are alot of great places off the strip I go to and the food is good and the slots are loose. Thats just the way it has to be....Good luck whatever you decide.

scorpio, sorry this got covered immediately. Thanks chatty for bringing it back.

I waited and kept checking back but no one had answered so I stayed away. Thanks to both of you for repsonding. I'm glad I didn't give up.
I like this site and look to it for support with my many issues.
We still can't make a decision, so we just sit and think. As time doesn't stand still, why are we? Well, there's reasons to go and reasons to stay. Maybe someday we'll just make up our minds and do it for ourselves.

Sorry you didn't get more feedback Scorpio115 but I just didn't have any input of value...Maybe someone will see it that possibly didn't see it before and give some tips.

JJ

We relocated five years ago - but not for retirement. DH and I took a job transfer after both the kids had flown the nest.

It was truly an adventure. We met great people and had a great time. But, when it was time to retire - we came back home. We still had family - kids, parents and extended relatives - and felt that that was were we should be.

We have just moved into a detached condo on a golf course. We plan on travelling this winter (getting out of the snow belt.)

It's hard to be away from loved ones. You always think that everyone will visit - but the truth is that if you want to see them - you pack up and go to them. We had a wonderful home in the south that we wanted our friends and family to enjoy. But, outside of sending our kids airline tickets - we were alone. Only one couple that we have been friends with since high school days made the trip.

We couldn't fly back for every holiday and so we spent most of them alone. I do think it made our marriage stronger - because we only had each other - but if your marriage isn't on solid ground to begin with, I think it could be a disaster.

For us, this will be 'home' for now. In time, if the kids move out of state, my parents are both gone, MIL is 80 and still independent but for how long?? There still might be one more move left in us - to a place with warmer winters. But, for now, we'll just hunker down here, follow the sun when we've had too much snow.

I missed this thread.

My husband's job keeps us moving a lot.

I like meeting new people and seeing new sights. It can be quite an adventure if you keep that mindset. I told him I'd follow him anywhere except Gallup, New Mexico!

I don't like being away from my kids/grandkids. We've talked about moving closer when he retires but who knows when that will be? He's showing no signs of stopping work for now. He talked about it for about five minutes but changed his mind the next day so who knows?

So, we just fly to visit family and it gets rid of the ache in my arms to hold my grandchildren.

I moved to Florida from Los Angeles for the wrong reason (a man). That's not the only reason, but I thought it was a good enough reason. I was wrong. I've been in Florida, alone, for almost 11 years. I went back to school, had a few jobs, now working at the same place for almost 2-1/2 years, and I find it difficult to build lasting relationships. Daytona Beach has grown so much it isn't the quaint little town I moved to. Lots of transients and tourists now. I was happy to get away from the big city and find my self in a developing big city. There are times I wish I never left LA and times I'm glad I did. Whatever you do, make sure it's for the right reason.

Scorpio, I forgot to mention that wherever you think about moving, please check the annual weather reports. The way climates are changing you don't want to move to known tornado/ hurricane/earthquake country unless you know what you're getting into.

We do want to make a change, but where we were thinking of heading is not where we belong I realize. Probably, even though the timing wasn't right, we would've been working towards that destination all along. The reasons for staying remain the same, but the reasons for going have now changed. Trying to fit it won't work. We thought we'd go to where our other son and his family are. Our only grandchildren are there. But we no longer feel welcome. We were kidding ourselves, or maybe we knew it all along. What move we make will now be only for ourselves, if we move at all.

scorpio115, We are in the same process of considering buying a home in Florida for retirement, we are making trips there regularly to see what the community is like and if we will feel comfortable with the life style, while looking at homes. It is a scary move, but presently we are in Missouri and this is not our home state either since we are New Yorkers originally. I think we are more concerned with getting back to the East coast and that is why we are prospecting Florida. You may need to figure out why you want the move before you actually consider the move. Whatever you do, it is important to please yourselfs first.
The very best of luck in whatever you decide.

[ June 25, 2006, 04:10 AM: Message edited by: MSInvestigator ]

MSI, I live in Florida and have experienced hurricanes here. Can be very scary. I think what you do with the elder abuse investigations is amazing and I applaud you. I would love to do something meaningful.

Anyone know anything about Idaho. Now that the son is grown and life in California is too expensive, I have been looking at moving to Idaho. It always seemed like a wonderful place to live - but I nned to know about the reality of living there from anyone who has or is currently living there.

thanks in advance
Donna

Many people from California are re-locating to Idaho. My brother lives near Clearwater.

Saundra, we are checking out St Pete area across the bay from Tampa. Do they get many hurricanes in that area??? Hurricanes can be as scary as tornados.

Thanks Bluebird,

Does your brother like it there?
Donna

Hubby and I are considering a move. Since I'm in the real-estate business; I knew sooner or later some house will cross my path where I'll just go ga-ga. After 16 years in this business it happened for the first time last week.

The house is just about an hour's drive from where we live now, but offers a beautiful view over a gorgeous lake and mountains. We'd be moving closer to one of our sons, and further away from the other…but be somewhat in the middle. I'd have to find a new nursing home for my Mom.

The problem is…do we want to deal with the hassle of moving? And is it worth the hassle; selling our house, packing (oh help…sooo much stuff) and then renovating this other house. I'm sort of afraid the work will be overwhelming, and I don't want my Hubby to be overworked. On the other hand it is a dream location, and a fantastic deal. If I could only push a button, and voile; we'd be in the finished home. It's all that stuff in between that is making me hesitate. I'm wondering if it's even worth it at our age. Hubby is 67 and I'm 57. I don't have that much of a problem with it...but maybe it's unfair to him. How would you ladies decide?

Hi, Hannelore: If it is something that both of you have set your heart on, then there should be no problem with the move. You can always hire contractors to do the renovation and movers can always pack for you. So, you can minimise any physical strain from that angle. I agree about how the in-betweens can be a nuisance. I have moved from NYC to California then back again before settling in the UK. I don't know if age matters with any move. Depends on individual circumstances I suppose.

So Hannelore...any decisions yet?

No JJ, no decision yet. I think I'll let the money decide. If we can afford the move and get packers and renovaters all inclusive within the price of our own house-sale, then we'll do it. If we have to put ourselves under financial pressure just becasue of a gorgious, breathtaking, monobombastic view...then we won't do it. sob. I'm putting our house up for sale this week. Yikes. I'm nervouse. Helps me relate to my customers, that's for sure.

A S., Moving, even the easiest move can put stress on any situation that is already stressful but may be well worth the gains of a tranquil place that you can both enjoy. This would most likely be your last move and sounds like a heavenly place to spend the remainder of your lives. One question you need both answer is; would one or the other of you be happy there alone?...Devils advocate here...One never knows, and this is an important factor when reaching our ages. Whatever you decide you know I am wishing you well and praying for you both and your mom too.

Thank you Chatty. Well, the price helped us make the decision too. We could have bought it, if we forfeited food and clothing for the next 30 years. I can't even skip a breakfast, so that solved that problem.
I sort of feel like the fox in that fable: The Fox and the Grapes . We can't buy that house, so I'm thinking of things like it's too far from shopping, hospital, and theatres anyway. You made some good points there.