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#80131 - 11/06/05 11:29 AM Re: give and receive advice
norma Offline
Member

Registered: 10/29/05
Posts: 286
Loc: western canada
Hi Lynnie, the safe house program ran about 7 years, it was a voluteer program, although each 'safe house operator' got a per diem initially of about 8 dollars per adult, 4 for each child to cover costs. The women, could stay up to 5 days. In that time we (if there was another voluteer available) would be taking them to lawyers, maybe the doctor's, looking for alternative housing if they did not want to go back home, taking their kids to school if necessary, getting the kids feeling safe. It was so often only at night when tears and details would come out. Because our house has 5 bedrooms,generally those with kids stayed here. The time period was too short for what needing to be done. Finally after this number of years, there was enough information around town to prove violence in one form or another does happen and is not "deserved'. Other people then got together and funds were raised for a full time, fully staffed, transition house. Since then we've had one man and his son brought here by the police because of the wife's behavior. He spoke of other men now needing a place to be safe from their wives, but i've since removed my name from the police station in case a place is needed so, dont know if anything in that area has formed.

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#80132 - 11/07/05 04:21 AM Re: give and receive advice
Princess Lenora Offline
Member

Registered: 11/11/04
Posts: 3503
Loc: Colorado
Norma, that is so generous of you to be involved in a safe house program. 5 days sounds like a short amount of time but those 5 days can be a matter of life and death!

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#80133 - 11/07/05 08:49 AM Re: give and receive advice
norma Offline
Member

Registered: 10/29/05
Posts: 286
Loc: western canada
Thanks Lynnie, but there wasn't a place to go when i had wanted one - and i had 3 daughters, the motivation on my part was not generousity, but wanting there to be places, if they ever needed one. (i like your words though). And it was also an attempt to make amends. I couldn't go back and give the affection my oldest girls needed when so often we each walked on egg shells here. I couldn't take back words they got instead of my husband. The women who came here, and their kids, gave me as much or more than i was able to give them, though we smoked alot of cigerettes, and drank alot of coffee, after all others were in bed, deep bonds quickly developed.
(and after the first night, they'd be saying of course to 'the secret swedish receipe' which they knew helped people sleep. (my granny made it for my dad when he was a boy, and he made it for me). (those grandparents were born in 1867 and 1873)

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