Thanks for the input your all right.. The funny thing is I live in Ca. They live in Az. We hardly get to talk. I do call my son to talk to him. His wife acts this way with our whole family though. Sometimes she won't even acknowledge that your there or say hi when you walk in the door..etc. Its really weird... I think she gets jealous of Davids' relationships with his family. Sad to say. I don't say much. I stay out of there way.. I do send cards and make things for my grandson and for them.
Have a Great Easter everyone..

Sending cards to your grandson and keeping in touch the best you can is about all you can do sometimes. Hopefully your D-I-L will grow up one day and realize what she's been missing - the opportunity to have had 2 mom's

My son is probably going to be moving far far away from me shortly -- and logically I know that they have to live their own life and the opportunity for them is better where they're going then here -- motherly I'm going to miss them soooooo much -- so in a few months I may be crying on your shoulder for support I think the worst part will not being "grandma" on a daily basis anymore

I guess now we can all understand how our parents felt when we left home

Lion, you said:

I guess now we can all understand how our parents felt when we left home.

You aren't kidding. I don't know how my mom did it. I admire her more each day. She was so good at minding her own business. My older sister and I talk about this now, though we didn't realize it at the time. I hope I can mind my own business and let my kids do as they please. She really let us use our wings to fly and I know it wasn't easy because we weren't always making perfect choices.

Mamma, keep reaching out. I think you may have hit the nail on the head when you mentioned jealousy. Hopefully she'll outgrow that.

I know now but never realized before and I find myself wondering why we all moved away so far?

I guess, like most things, we don't realize how things "hurt" until it happens to us personally.

My sister and her family live in the mid-west and my brother lives out in Montana. I stay here in Florida for one reason - my parents. They are in their 80's and I just can't leave them alone - so when the kids leave - eventhough we want to move closer to them -- my parents need us more than they do so here we'll stay ---

It just seems a shame that we have to make choices like that -- I would fit right in with those huge families that all live on the same block

Boy how times have changed. While traveling last weekend we kept commenting on the number of people who fly these days. Remember when everyone lived in the same town and the most you had to do was drive a mile to see them? I'm wiht you lion.

I think the hard part is when a parent is sick in another town. Trying to juggle life to get to that parent must be so stressful. I remember what my out of town sister went through when mom was sick and dying. Fortunately, she brought most of her work with her on her lap top, but her family still had to do without her for weeks.

Bring back the good old days.

MammaJude,
I know just how you feel. We had much the same scenario going with my DIL. We always thought she just didn't care for us because we were so different from her family. They call her every day, tell her and my son what to do, how to do it, then get mad at them when they don't. My husband and I decided early on to stick with a non-interference policy. We'd be there if our kids needed us, otherwise, we'd keep our noses out of their business. Unfortunately, that got us pretty much ignored. Her parents took it too far however and our DIL rebelled when they began yelling at her in front of our little grandson and undermining her authority. She called them on it and insisted they change their ways. It's not going very well for her, sadly. In the meantime, she and I have grown closer; we talk more, spend more time together. One day, she said, "Why can't my mother be more like you?" I know my mouth dropped open, I was mind-boggled. Frankly, I feel sorry for her parents, at all they are missing, because they'd rather be right in their own minds than have a good relationship with their daughter. Plus, they are missing out on time with their grandsons. Foolish people.

I am so fortunate to have a wonderful loving daughter-in-law. She is like a best friend and comes to me for advice on cooking homemaking etc. I love her to death and feel more like she is my own daughter. If she has her way we would all live in a big home together, she feels like I do and who knows maybe one day we will. Its sad we don't learn how important family is when we're very young....

I'm close to my DIL and SIL. I refuse to interfere and if my daughter is having a problem, I send her a book on the topic rather than give my advice. She has children to consider and I'd hate to see them without their Daddy, a very loving father.

I never talk to my DIL about problems unless she brings them up. She's a wonderful mother to my grandkids and has tolerated a lot from my son. She knows I'll always be there for her.

Dianne, I love the idea of sending books instead of giving your advice. Does she mind getting the books? DO you mention them ahead of time?

Chatty, I have two sons. I'm already praying they'll marry loving gals.

Copy, you are wise. It sounds like you've given up control. I think some parents try too hard to make a difference once the kids leave home.

My parents set a good example in this depratment. Mom is sadly gone. Dad continues to mind his business, but somehow gently gives an idea of his feelings concerning sticky situations. I hope he's around longer becasue I still need to learn how he does it!