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#220545 - 10/31/14 08:21 PM Knock Knock: Who's there? Happy Halloween!
Anne Holmes Administrator Offline
Boomer in Chief

Registered: 03/12/10
Posts: 3182
Loc: Illinois
I've been receiving a lot of good jokes online today. Many knock knock jokes, since apparently today, in honor of kids knocking on doors to trick or treat, today is now unofficially known as "National Knock Knock Day." Who knew?

Here are some groaners:
(Remember, knock-knock jokes don't have to be funny. In fact, sometimes the louder the groan, the more satisfying the joke.)

Knock knock.
Who's there?
Cash.
Cash who?
No thanks, but I would like a peanut instead!

Knock knock.
Who's there?
Doris.
Doris who?
Doris locked, that's why I'm knocking!

Knock knock.
Who's there?
Banana.
Banana who?
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Banana.
Banana who?
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Banana.
Banana who?
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Orange.
Orange who?
Orange you glad I didn't say "banana"?

Knock knock.
Who's there?
Madam.
Madam who?
Madam foot got caught in the door!

Knock knock.
Who's there?
Cows go.
Cows go who?
No, cows go moo!

Knock knock.
Who's there?
Woof woof woof.
Woof woof woof who?
Make up your mind, are you a dog or an owl?

Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Wendy.
Wendy who?
Wendy wind blows de cradle will rock.

Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Dishes.
Dishes who?
Dishes the police – open up!
_________________________
Boomer in Chief of Boomer Women Speak and the National Association of Baby Boomer Women.
www.nabbw.com
www.boomerwomenspeak.com
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#220546 - 10/31/14 08:25 PM Re: Knock Knock: Who's there? Happy Halloween! [Re: Anne Holmes]
Anne Holmes Administrator Offline
Boomer in Chief

Registered: 03/12/10
Posts: 3182
Loc: Illinois
And, if you're not into knock knock jokes, here's a great but more traditional joke I heard today from my old college friend, Susan Taylor:

Quote:
Cabbie picks up a Nun…

She gets into the cab, and notices that the VERY handsome cab driver won't stop staring at her. She asks him why he is staring. He replies: "I have a question to ask you but I don't want to offend you."

She answers, "My son, you cannot offend me. When you're as old as I am and have been a nun as long as I have, you get a chance to see and hear just about everything. I'm sure that there's nothing you could say or ask that I would find offensive." "Well, I've always had a fantasy to have a nun kiss me." She responds, "Well, let's see what we can do about that: #1, you have to be single and #2, you must be Catholic." The cab driver is very excited and says, Yes, I'm single and Catholic!"

"OK" the nun says. "Pull into the next alley." The nun fulfills his fantasy, with a kiss that would make a hooker blush. When they get back on the road, the cab driver starts crying. "My dear child," says the nun, "why are you crying?" "Forgive me but I've sinned. I lied and I must confess, I'm married and I'm Jewish." The nun says, "That's OK. My name is Kevin and I'm going to a Halloween party.
_________________________
Boomer in Chief of Boomer Women Speak and the National Association of Baby Boomer Women.
www.nabbw.com
www.boomerwomenspeak.com
www.boomerlifestyle.com
www.boomerco.com

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#220563 - 11/09/14 09:29 PM Re: Knock Knock: Who's there? Happy Halloween! [Re: Anne Holmes]
jabber Offline
Member

Registered: 02/17/05
Posts: 9984
Loc: New York State
Knock-Knock
Who's there?
Adore.
Adore who?
Open up. A door is between us.

Knock-knock
Who's there?
Anee.
Anee who.
Anee to come in, it's cold outside.

A businesswoman is sitting at a bar. A man approaches her.
"Hi, honey," he says. "Want a little company?"
"Why?" asks the woman. "Do you have one to sell?"
_________________________
"MOLLIE'S FOLLIES" by Bonnie Mill-Lemke, aka Jabber, is available at the Kindle Store and in paperback on Amazon.com.

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