Hey Chatty

I'm widya on that one! That site wasn't a particular hit with me when I was dating. I got some of the weirdest "matches" there and several friends had the same experience. However, another friend had some really kewl dates (weird ones too, of course, that is part of the gig!).

I joined E-Harmony for three months several years ago. After filling out their extensive questionnaire, they matched me with men I had nothing in common with and way outside the distance I specified. I found myself wondering why anyone would want to fill out an extensive questionnaire if it did not produce the matches specified. Still don't know, but didn't sign up again after the 3 months. I'm just getting out there and doing the things I love -- hiking, cycling, volunteering -- and if I meet a kindred soul that would be great. If not, I'm having a heck of a time.

That could be AND I've heard of several folks who got the "nobody matches you" gig. Geez, who DO they match? And I, for the first time in my life, chose not to change my requirements or my standards. I either got what I was looking for or kept going on my own way. Boy, was that ever liberating!

Now I have a man I adore and whom I love more than anyone I've known in my life...which is what made the almost breakup so blasted hard to handle! I was frustrated, I'll admit that, and I had NEVER stopped loving him. I'm glad he is here for the moment and will keep on keepin' on!

My dh and I laugh when we see the commercials for eharmony. He'll say "That doesn't work, does it?" That's how we met!

Almost five years ago I signed up for eharmony. I had the same as the OP, no matches. I thought, "Well, that's just great. Even in cyberland there's no one?!" Dh, on the other hand, was receiving matches from hundreds of miles away (he had specified a 50 mile radius)with absolutely nothing in common.

So, New Years Eve of 2003 I'm home alone watching chick flick videos (Harry Met Sally, of course) and I get this match email. Wryly thinking, "NOW? Why couldn't this of come before so I could be on a date New Year's Eve?!" The rest is history: after email, phone, meeting in January, got married in June 2004.

It certainly doesn't work for everyone. I have several friends of varying ages that have tried eharmony and have had no luck.

Before I met dh, I also tried match.com. It can be fun if you play it very safe and weed the wackos out early on! One thing I remember about match.com was all the men my age looking for women half their age!

They can look but they can't find!!! Dream on old farts!

Joan, we have several other women here who met their hubbies online. Glad to hear it worked for you.

Anne, if I was single, I think I'd prefer meeting someone through a friend too. And that comes from a gal who's met several women online, and then in person. I even had one women I met online, come stay at our home. Do you know who that was? It was Georgia/The Queen.

I know why men want women half their own age, yet why do young women want men their father's age?

I think they want a daddy to take care of them?

too funny! Got that right!

I answered this post in length yesterday and somehow erased it and was so ticked off, I just moved on. Okay here I go again.

Dotsie, I have to disagree completely with the needing a daddy answer you gave. My first husband was three years older than me, and it was great, except I always felt like I had to almost mother him. I was older mentally and emotionally than he was and it showed.

After he passed a couple years later, I met and married a man nineteen years older than me.

I already had a daddy who loved me, and certainly didn't think in any way, shape, or form, of Chet as a daddy.

OH MY GOD! I lusted after this man in everyway, everyday. He was handsome, smart, accomplished, sexy, tough, fun, and we were inseperable for fourteen years. I was crazy about him and he me. He took care of me for a change, he took care of everything. With dear husband number one, I had to do it all or call my dad and he'd take care of whatever it was. But with Chet, either he took care of it or hired someone to do it without ever bothering me at all. I was his Princess and walloowed in that happily.

Being with an older man is definitely different in some ways than with a young man and to me it is all positive. If I had it to do over again I'd pick an older man every time. And not as my DADDY either!!!!! I suppose it is if you haven't tried it, don't knock it!