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#160835 - 09/24/08 07:06 PM Dating after being widowed
Dotsie Offline
Founder

Registered: 07/09/08
Posts: 23647
Loc: Maryland
Ladies, chatty found this artilce online and we wanted to share it here:

http://lifestyle.msn.com/relationships/articlematch.aspx?cp-documentid=9708247&GT1=32023

We thought it was worth sharing.
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#160872 - 09/24/08 10:13 PM Re: Dating after being widowed [Re: Dotsie]
chatty lady Offline
Writer

Registered: 02/24/04
Posts: 20267
Loc: Nevada
Thanks Dotsie for posting this article, I hope it helps someone. It opened my eyes somewhat on a few things...
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#165853 - 11/17/08 07:24 PM Re: Dating after being widowed [Re: chatty lady]
chatty lady Offline
Writer

Registered: 02/24/04
Posts: 20267
Loc: Nevada
Its weird I know but I have NO desire to date. I would rather be out and about with girlfriends just laughing and having a ball. Men are too much trouble!
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#165856 - 11/17/08 07:29 PM Re: Dating after being widowed [Re: chatty lady]
chickadee Offline
Member

Registered: 09/26/04
Posts: 3910
Loc: Alabama
I think the statement "It's not so much about meeting the right person, as it is about becoming the right person," says mountains about a relationship. I am a better person in my relationship but it came at the cost of a divorce.
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#165895 - 11/18/08 01:21 PM Re: Dating after being widowed [Re: chickadee]
Dotsie Offline
Founder

Registered: 07/09/08
Posts: 23647
Loc: Maryland
chick, I totally agree. In relationships, we too often point the finger at the other person when we should really be pointing it at ourselves. How can we change to make the relationship better?
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#165909 - 11/18/08 02:09 PM Re: Dating after being widowed [Re: Dotsie]
Mama Red Offline


Registered: 08/12/08
Posts: 676
Loc: Wauconda, IL
Chick...100% agree and if there is one thing I've learned through the lessons I've been handed is 'I can't change someone else, I must be the person I want to attract'. And, dadgummit, I sure wish someone else could do the work (grin). It sure would make my life easier if that would happen! Reminds me of a saying my dad used often "wish in one hand..."
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#165994 - 11/19/08 04:07 PM Re: Dating after being widowed [Re: Mama Red]
Dotsie Offline
Founder

Registered: 07/09/08
Posts: 23647
Loc: Maryland
Mama, I agree. I've known plenty of women who've wanted to work at a relationship, but the men are stubborn. Can't get very far like that.
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#166001 - 11/19/08 06:02 PM Re: Dating after being widowed [Re: Dotsie]
Mama Red Offline


Registered: 08/12/08
Posts: 676
Loc: Wauconda, IL
Nope, Dotsie, you're right! And it seems to me, although my opinion *could* be a bit biased (grin), that women get to lead the way on the relationship front!
_________________________
Love and light, hugs and blessings

MamaRed (Jerilynne)
www.mamaredspeaks.com
www.onemillionacts.com
Coming Summer 2009 "Kick-Butt Kindness: 52 No Cost Ways to Ripple Kindness 'Round the World"

Let's create Kick-Butt-and-Take-Names Lives!

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#166541 - 11/26/08 09:00 PM Re: Dating after being widowed [Re: Mama Red]
celtic_flame Offline


Registered: 11/24/06
Posts: 2930
Loc: Belfast/Northern Ireland
Choose to focus on the good things, starting with the fact that you are ready for or have found love again. Love is meant to be celebrated; not something of which to be afraid."



"Our attitude either gets in the way or creates a way," Glenn concludes.

I love that last quote more for a mantra for life than just about love again after being widowed. A reallie good find chattie and Dotsie

i think i gonna nick that quote poor rumi had his day lol.
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"Our attitude either gets in the way or creates a way," Sam Glenn

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#167157 - 12/07/08 04:06 PM Re: Dating after being widowed [Re: celtic_flame]
copygal Offline
Member

Registered: 03/05/05
Posts: 134
Loc: Texas
Good Morning Ladies,
You've all got good points. We must work on ourselves first, to be our best selves, in order to have a successful relationship; hopefully, we all learned that the first time around in the romance dance. It's been quite an experience finding myself again after losing my husband, then working on that new self, learning new things, discovering a brand new life. But, I have to say that I'm with Chatty. I'm having a blast with friends, starting a new career and fully appreciating my independence and freedom. I loved my husband, he was a sweetheart, but I'm really not interested in looking around for love again. Men are a lot of trouble. I spent 35 years training the last one; don't think I have the time or patience to train another. I'm having too much fun as I am.
Copygal
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