Has your spouse or partner become ill? Are you in the caregiving role?

You Want Me To Do What? is a five-week workshop, conducted through group e-mails, that uses journaling to relieve caregiver stress. For information and a chance to get free feedback on a journaling sample, contact facilitator B. Lynn Goodwin, Lgood67334@comcast.net, and put “Journaling” in the subject box. Lynn is a veteran of over six years of caregiving, a freelance writer and editor, and a former college and high school teacher. Check out her work at Writer Advice, www.writeradvice.com.

In my previous post, I should have told you what caregivers who've tried You Want Me to Do What? are saying. Here are a few examples. E-mail me at Lgood67334@comcast.net for more information and a free offer.

“I am very grateful for the chance to say how this feels to people who will really get it.”
--Nancy, caregiver and writer, Palo Alto, California

“Writing from the heart seems to be all that is needed.” --Marilyn, trainer and coach, Concord, CA

“My spirit has been lifted more in participating with all of you than anything else I’ve tried.” --Eileen, caregiver and former office manager, Antioch, CA

Whatever your circumstances, I wish you only the best in your caregiving journey. Let me know if you have questions. Thanks!

Lynn

Lynn, as a caregiver, myself, I can attest to the fact that writing really helps. I know that your audience will be pleased, once again, with the class.

While Mom was sick, I journaled many mornings. It was mainly a prayer jouranl. I save all my journals and one day, I hope to dig that one out to reflect on Mom's death and dying. Sounds weird, but I might be reaydy to do that. This is another reason journaling is so great. It allows you to look in the past and see where you were at the time. Sometimes when I look back, I don't even recall the writing moment. Other times, I remember every little detail wlithout reading. It's weird and interesting.

When my first husband was dying, I did keep a journal of sorts. I was so mad but couldn't say the things in my head outloud, so I wrote them all down. To this day I am unable to read what I wrote so many years ago when I was filled with such sorrow and rage...

Aww, sorry about that chatty. It's hard to believe you've lived through such tragedy because you have so much light to shine. Thanks for your example.

Hhhmmmm, dungeon's have locks and keys. Not a bad idea to be able to control when you see someone. Wanna share the plans? ROFL....

Now to be serious. I kept a journal when my dad was sick and dying. Unbeknownst to me, my mother did the same. I found it after she died. It was painful reading, but I'm glad I found it.

Hindsight is always 20/20. I was young when my dad died (22), and even though I always tried to take care of my mom and be a good daughter, looking back, I could have done so much more for her. If I'd only known then what I know now (she's been gone for 11 years). Funny how age improves us in so many ways.

I love to read back over the journals I've kept over the years. Some make me laugh, some bring tears, and some make me say "what in the world was I thinking?!?" I admit I used to worry about other eyes reading what I'd written at times. Now with computers (and password protect features), that's no longer a worry.

:-)

Whirlwind

Oh Anne. I'm so sorry you had to go through that. I'm so sorry that all who have written above had to go through the painful experiences. My dad had cancer of the esophagas (sp?), and that was an awful thing to witness. Mama had emphysema, but once she went to the hospital she went quickly (1 week). You're right. You never forget.

Whirlwind

whirlwind, it's great to see you again. I've heard cancer of the esophagus is hard to witness. Do those patients have to be tube fed? How sad. Mom died of lung cancer that spread to the bone before they caught it. Very nasty to witness.

I love that you say "I was filled with such sorrow and rage..." I know the feeling. Even my handwriting on certain days screams fury. I'm glad you journaled and that you kept it, and I'm glad you spilled all that rage in the journal and not on the husband.

Lynn
www.writeradvice.com

Hi Whirlwind,

I'm so glad you're not worried about others reading your journals. Don't worry about the handwritten ones either. Most people won't be able to read most handwriting.

The comment about your mother's journal, "It was painful reading, but I'm glad I found it," is very reassuring. I wonder if a daughter gets to know her mother in a new way when she finds an old journal. That's what happened in THE BRIDGES OF MADISON COUNTY.

Thanks for sharing this. I love reading other people's experiences around journaling.

Lynn
www.writeradvice.com

Hi Anne,

You say, "I never wrote it down, but I won't forget it either," but you wrote it recently and shared it here with Boomer Women, who will relate and appreciate your specific description. The details about staying awake all night and ringing the bell make this very immediate.

Thanks for sharing it.

Lynn
www.writeradvice.com

Lynn, My handwriting differs too, depending on my mood and what I'm writing about. Interesting.

Well good, I thought it was just mine...