The storm found me missing Mom again. I have so many memories of her during snow storms and they all revolve around her being inside.

She wasn't the type to get out and shovel, walk the streets, or watch us sled.

She was always home with paper laid on the floor for the wet boots, gloves, hats, socks, coats, and sweaters for the many kids who crashed our doors feeling frost-bit and frozen.

She then started running the dryer for us and placing assorted items on the radiators in our home so things could dry and we could be on our way again.

I recall our dryer having a Stop and Dry mode with a little rack to put our boots on. Whatever happened to that feature?

She allowed us to dig through the cabinets for junk food and wolf it down, leaving messes behind.

She often had a jig-saw puzzle going so we could dabble a little with that, only to be distracted by the buzzer on the dryer...and out the door again.

"Be careful and don't stay out as long this time!", she'd scream as we headed to the hill.

She was quite an awesome lady!

It sounds like you have a wonderful mom -- and yes I used the word HAVE because you still DO have a wonderful mom.

She isn't here in the flesh to still do those things for you -- but she's still a "warm fuzzy" feeling deep inside you and you have wonderful memories to get you through the day.

You have little traditions to hand down to your children -- the little things that they may not think about until one day they are walking through a day remembering THEIR great mom

So remember her as if she's just living down the street -- and smile at your new fangled dryer with none of the great features of the past -- run your bare toes in front of the door where wet newspapers could be and know she did a pretty good job of raising a really nice family

(p.s.)
it must be a time for remembering -- my son's 25th birthday was yesterday

And the 21st was the fifth anniversary of my daughter's death in the house fire. Tomorrow will be five years since we buried her. It's also my dad's 80th birthday.
I expected to feel gloomy and blue all day Friday. I did have a few blue moments, mostly from watching tv about the nightclub fire. That brought back some very painful memories of picking through the ashes to try to recover some article of Teresa's or Regan's that might be salvageable..nothing was. Everything was either burned, smoke-damaged, or ruined by the fireman's water hose.
I have found that by concentrating on the positive memories, the negative ones start to fade...eventually. The pain will always lurk under the surface, and sometimes at unexpected times will come shooting up from the depths of our souls, but I am learning how to anticipate these times and immediately turn my thoughts to positive ones. When I am alone, I sometimes let my feelings surface and have a good cry. But it never lasts more than a few seconds and it is over. I guess I must be healing. Its about time.

i got this in an email today and thought i would share

The young mother set her foot on the path of life. "Is this the long way?" she asked. And the guide said: "Yes, and the way is hard. And you will be old before you reach the end of it. But the end will be better than the beginning."

But the young mother was happy, and she would not
believe that anything could be better than these
years. So she played with her children, and
gathered flowers for them along the way, and bathed them in the clear streams; and the sun shone on them, and the young Mother said, "Nothing will ever be lovelier than this."

Then the night came, and the storm, and the path was dark, and the children shook with fear and cold, and the mother drew them close and covered them with her shawl, and the children said, "Mother, we are not afraid, for you are near, and no harm can come."

And the morning came, and there was a hill ahead,
and the children climbed and grew weary, and the
mother was weary. But at all times she said to the children," A little patience and we are there." So the children climbed, and when they reached the top they said, "Mother, we would not have done it without you."

And the mother, when she lay down at night looked up at the stars and said, "This is a better day than the last, for my children have learned fortitude in the face of hardness. Yesterday I gave them courage. Today, I have given them strength."

And the next day came strange clouds which darkened the earth, clouds of war and hate and evil, and the children groped and stumbled, and the mother said: "Look up.! Lift your eyes to the light." And the children looked and saw above the clouds an everlasting glory, and it guided them beyond the darkness.

And that night the Mother said, "This is the best
day of all, for I have shown my children God."

And the days went on, and the weeks and the months and the years, and the mother grew old and she was little and bent. But her children were tall and strong, and walked with courage. And when the way was rough, they lifted her, for she was as light as a feather; and at last they came to a hill, and beyond they could see a shining road and golden gates flung wide. And mother said: "I have reached the end of my journey. And now I know the end is better than the beginning, for my children can walk alone, and their children after them."

And the children said, " You will always walk with us, Mother, even when you have gone through the gates." And they stood and watched her as she went on alone, and the gates closed after her. And they said: "We cannot see her, but she is with us still. A Mother like ours is more than a memory. She is a living presence."

Your Mother is always with you. She's the whisper
of the leaves as you walk down the street; she's
the smell of bleach in your freshly laundered socks; she's the cool hand on your brow when you're not well. Your Mother lives inside your laughter. And she's crystallized in every tear drop. She's the place you came from, your first home; and she's the map you follow with every step you take. She's your first love and your first heartbreak, and nothing on earth can separate you..

Not time, not space...not even death!

Lion's paw, that was so beautiful! Thank you for sharing that with us. I actually needed that.

Lion's Paw, that truly was a beautiful post.

I lost a very close friend recently and could identify with that. Because my friend had no children or close family members, I am the beneficiary of the estate.

Because the death was in another state and I'm still recovering, settling the estate is proving to be very complicated. I have a lawyer, but I've already driven her completely nuts. It's just so difficult being far away and dealing with the emotions of it at the same time I'm trying to make a lot of decisions.

I wonder if someone on here might have first hand experience from which I might learn what to expect.

smile

LP, ya made me cry, woman -- 'n I'm sittin' in the public library! Did you compose that piece yourself.

*Sigh*.

i WISH

my niece sent it to me in an email -- but you can relate to it with the loss of any loved one -- my son is with me every where i go -- in everything i look at -- so i thought i would share it

i haven't had any experience with estates -- but i can imagine this will be a very difficult time for you -- the emotional part of it's hard enough without adding the pressure of the estate

what would we do without this forum to vent in

Smilinize, sorry to hear of your woes. Are you also the executor of your firend's estate as well as the beneficiary? As the beneficiary you shouldn't really have any requirements regarding the settlement of the estate -- just receive the settlement when it's all been done, far as I know. If you are also the executor then that is definitley a burden of work and responsibility!

My brother was my father's executor and it was a lot (and he had 8 of us -- his brothers and sisters -- all wantin' to know "what's next?" all along through the process!