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#14040 - 03/18/05 11:51 PM Re: "Smashed"
Kathryn Offline
Member

Registered: 11/20/02
Posts: 317
Loc: Towson
That's exactly the point my doctor makes...the mystique makes it intriguing for kids!

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#14041 - 03/19/05 12:53 AM Re: "Smashed"
Danita Offline
Member

Registered: 01/24/05
Posts: 1550
Loc: Colorado
I don't know if this will interest anyone or not - but I figured I would throw it out there.

My daughter smoked pot for the first time this summer - she actually screwed things up pretty good for herself (lost our trust, etc).

I found a place online that sells home drug testing kits - and they are affordable.

We discussed this with our daughter, and let her know that when she goes out with her friends or overnight - that we have the right to test her. If she doesn't allow us to - she is already guilty.

She knows if she is guilty of using - then she will be roped in tight. She doesn't want that!

This gives her a REALLY good excuse to not use.

If anyone is interested, I would be happy to post the website.

danita

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#14042 - 03/23/05 08:16 AM Re: "Smashed"
Dotsie Offline
Founder

Registered: 07/09/08
Posts: 23647
Loc: Maryland
One of the best pieces of advice I learned was at a drug/alcohol seminar when our oldest was a freshman in high school. The football coach said to put an end to sleep overs and last minute plans via phone. He also advised parents to welcome thier children home at the end of the night.

We can make a difference by making them sleep in their own beds and by waiting up for them when they arrive home in the evening. I'm not saying we can put an end to everything, but we can create some control if they know they have to see Mom or Dad when they walk through the door.

The drug testing is a great idea. I think by the time they're juniors and seniors they can use the excuse that they're parents test them and won't allow certain behaviors. By that time they have a circle of friends. I think it's harder for the 8th, 9th, and 10th graders because they are more caught up with the peer pressure. Any thoughts?

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#14043 - 03/23/05 06:46 AM Re: "Smashed"
chatty lady Offline
Writer

Registered: 02/24/04
Posts: 20267
Loc: Nevada
Only to say these measures work...really work. I was strict and am still glad I was. My parents met me at the door if I were out and were strict and I was and am a better person for it. I still thank my mom.... [Big Grin]

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#14044 - 03/23/05 09:40 AM Re: "Smashed"
Jersey Girl Offline
Member

Registered: 03/14/05
Posts: 247
Loc: New Jersey
I'm fortunate that my children never bought into the peer pressure. (I guess my crossed fingers and nail biting paid off)I know they have had occassional drinks but they were too driven to let something like that get in the way of their goals. A friend of mine does have a problem with her 24 year-old daughter. She quit college in her third year began working and she never has any money for her credit card bills and she needs a car to get to work but can't afford one, anyway she always has money to go out drinking on the weekends. My friend is tired of finding her daughter and unfamiliar friends passed out on the couch. The irony of all this. I was what some would consider a leniant parent. I gave the kids enough room to come into their own yet always stayed involved and threw down a heavy hand when needed and my friend was the strict parent. All I can say is do your best to guide children and be consistent.

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#14045 - 03/24/05 04:10 AM Re: "Smashed"
chatty lady Offline
Writer

Registered: 02/24/04
Posts: 20267
Loc: Nevada
At least her daughter is passed out on her sofa and not somewhere strange. If there can be any upside to this that would be the only one. This too shall pass, the question here is can we parents live through it while we wait? [Confused]

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