On Wednesday it will be our 15th wedding anniversary...Freddie was only physically with me for 11 anniversaries but I still feel connected to him. We had a wonderful 11 years (he died 1 week after we celebrated our 11th anniversary in his hospital room) and I have decided to choose celebrating how blessed we were to find and love each other at midlife (45 and 50). Yes, I still have my moments of tears but I can find my lips smiling when I think of the fun memories more often. I know many others have not even had a week of what I had for those 11 years - romance, hand holding, love, respect, best friends, and best of all laughter....how could I feel anything but blessed!!

I just wanted to share my feelings since it has taken me almost 4 years to get to looking at this enormous hole in my life in a positive light. I don't think its any particular time frame for anyone going thru widowhood but to be able to smile at all the fun memories is great. I know my husband is still with me - in that special place in my heart that no one can ever reach and of course, spiritually.

On our wedding day, my son was walking me down the aisle to "give me away" and half way down the aisle my husband-to-be turned from the alter and proceeded to meet my son and I in the middle of the aisle! He turned to my 19 year old son and said "I just can't wait any longer to make this beautiful woman my wife - so if its OK with you I'll take her from here" We walked at such a fast pace to the alter, I could hardly keep up!! How could I not be grateful for the time I had with this wonderful man....

Thanks for listening...I'm a new member and I have found such comfort here....I just needed to share this tonite.

Blessings to all of you,
Char

Char222, strange that we have similar names, mine is Charleen and I too am a widow. Once married only 5 years and the second time for 14. I never thought it could happen to me twice. I still feel a strong bond between myself and my first husband everytime I look into my sons face, and my grandsons face as well. The three of them could be triplets. I'm sorry for your loss.

Char, I, too, am sorry for your deep loss. You just gave a beautiful tribute to your husband for all of us to hear. How wonderful that you now can smile and feel fortunate. Bless you this week.

I'm grateful you are now able to think about him and smile recalling the great memories. You are wise to focus on the blessings. I'm sure that's what he'd want his loved one to do.

What a cute visual you gave of the two of you scrambling for the alter.

What will you do this Wednesday? Whatever you choose, I pray you are still feeling blessed by your everlasting bond with him.