Dear FoundHerVoice,
Congrats to you for making it through the first year. Although I was divorced 12 years ago, I remember clearly what it was like to bring my children through as well as myself. That first year is all about making new traditions and leaving behind what you were accustomed to...the good and the bad. Your attitude is so positive, which I believe is important as you experience everything from a new perspective. But it can be exciting and happy. It just depends on how you choose to live it. My ex has run me through the mill over the last 12 years, and now that my children are close to adult age, and I cannot shield them the way I used to, he tries to play his crap with them and that totally sucks! Sorry ladies, but that is the strongest yet cleanest word I can use to describe it. However, they are finding their way with my love and support. Keep doing what you are doing. You have so much to look forward to! By the way....enjoy that dancing. My hobby is ballroom dancing and I love it! I met so many wonderful people. It is a great way to be social without the worry of being "hit on" when you don't want it! Enjoy!

What observations/helpful advice do y'all have post-divorce for women who are dealing with uncooperative ex-spouses regarding dependent children? Have your views changed over time?

Any and all enlightenment is appreciated!

Hugs,
Foundhervoice-atlast

Look how beautiful you are! Could you give more details? Not sure what you mean. Thanks!

it must have been difficult but i really admire you!!! now you can be proud to say you're strong!!!

I've considered divorce, but am working on building up our marriage again. If it is at all possible; it is the easier and better way for all.

Still, Dear Foundhervoice-atlast, I have copied and saved your post. I hope and pray I won't ever need it, but just in case;....I know it would help me in many ways.

You have chosen the best way for you, and how wonderful that you can look back and say it was the only way.

Got my paperwork via an attachment and filled it out. I have been married three times and divorced so I think I qualify. Waiting to hear from you...

Hannelore, I am glad you have chosen to make it work. I've been following you on this mission. You are still on my prayer list (Hannelore-happy within marriage). How's it going?

Dotsie, I am deeply touched that you still include me in your prayer list, thank you so much,

I don't want to turn this thread to me, so I'll just give you a brief update.

Since I left and went on that one over-night…no more tears; which alone is a major breakthrough. I don't know really if things are much better. We are blessed to have our grandchild with us, which does bond us and at the same time serves as a distraction from our own problems. Maybe God sent us our own cupid angel. Gee, what a nice thought.

The true test is when our grandchild is gone, and our old life is back. I try to think positive and had this quote sent to me last week, which I would love to live by,…but need more work on the patience thing; here it is…


Recipe For Happiness
Two heaped cups of patience,
One heartful of love,
Two handfuls of generosity,
One headful of understanding and a dash of humour,
Sprinkle with kindness, add plenty of faith and mix well.

Spread over a period of a lifetime and serve to everyone you meet.

Boy talk about "get right to the heart of things." Thats what this verse does. Very inspiring.

Hannelore, you are so wise to recognize the distraction of your grandchild. But what a blessing she is at this very time. She's allowing you to draw closer through her and then maybe after she goes home to Mom and Dad, you will be better able to address your other issues. That's wha I'm hoping and praying for. How's Mom? Any companion yet?