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#122878 - 08/02/07 08:36 PM Re: Rollercoaster
Jeannine Offline
Member

Registered: 01/03/06
Posts: 195
Loc: Georgia, U.S.
Dotsie, you know, I think it has a lot to do with 'programming'. I mean, there we are, live-in parents, for years and years, main objective-raising our children to the best of our abilities. Family group first, at all times. Then, suddenly, they are no longer a permanent presence in our homes. We adjust, some more slowly than others, but, we do adjust. Just when we have 'shifted gears', so to speak, we may find one or more of our children back in our home, temporarily. Result-We automatically shift back into the well-remembered progamming. Often, this is quite pleasing-it feels natural, comfy, right. We may beat-up on ourselves a bit, if we do feel these emotions, after all, we have been striving to carve out for ourselves the next phase of our lives, during the childrens' absence.

We will eventually succeed. Of course, our children are our children, we will be there for them, when necessity arises. But, the day will come, when the old program seems to have undergone an update...It will be less of a strain on our newly re-defined lives.
_________________________
Jeannine Schenewerk
www.intouchwithjeannine.com

[i]'It's never too late in Fiction-- or in Life to Revise.'
---Nancy Thayer

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#122879 - 08/03/07 02:12 AM Re: Rollercoaster [Re: Mountain Ash]
Misfire Offline
Member

Registered: 10/09/04
Posts: 83
Loc: Maryland
My older daughter came home from college in early May and stayed with us long enough to get ready for a month of studying in Japan. She's been home with us since early July but, alas, in only 2 weeks we'll be taking her back to college again. There's a great book of essays -- The Empty Nest (edited by Karen Stabiner) that describes what we're feeling.
_________________________
Cyberhugs,
Misfire

We cannot direct the wind, but we can learn how to adjust our sails.

We cannot control the wave, but we can learn how to swim.

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#122880 - 08/07/07 12:58 PM Re: Rollercoaster [Re: Misfire]
Dotsie Offline
Founder

Registered: 07/09/08
Posts: 23647
Loc: Maryland
Misfire, how was her first year of college? I'll have to chek out that book.

Our daughter took summer classes and lived on campus. She is now with us for a couple weeks until she goes back. It's nice having her around. She also has a friend who is living with us for a couple weeks. It's been fun having another girl because we have two sons and our daughter was usally out-numbered.
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#122881 - 08/09/07 08:24 PM Re: Rollercoaster [Re: Mountain Ash]
Misfire Offline
Member

Registered: 10/09/04
Posts: 83
Loc: Maryland
Our older daughter's first year away at college went great. She liked living on her own and admitted that she only felt homesick when she thought about our puppy dog! I'm not hurt by her comment. I'm happy that she's happy at school. Our goal was to raise independent girls who want to leave home and we did!
_________________________
Cyberhugs,
Misfire

We cannot direct the wind, but we can learn how to adjust our sails.

We cannot control the wave, but we can learn how to swim.

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#122882 - 08/17/07 08:31 AM Re: Rollercoaster [Re: Misfire]
Dotsie Offline
Founder

Registered: 07/09/08
Posts: 23647
Loc: Maryland
Misfire, I totally agree with your post. If the kids are happy living away from home and being independent, we've done our job.

I guess she's getting ready to go back soon. SO is our daughter.
_________________________
Founder Emeritus of Boomer Women Speak and the National Association of Baby Boomer Women.
www.nabbw.com
www.boomerwomenspeak.com


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#122883 - 08/22/07 06:32 AM Re: Rollercoaster
AvalonBlondi Offline
Member

Registered: 11/07/05
Posts: 1096
Loc: West Chester ,PA
My youngest daughter graduated from college in May and took a fabulous job with Nestle's..I am so happy for her success but she has moved 450 miles south to North Carolina...I miss her so much it hurts my heart... she calls me every day and keeps me in her life that way... but now my nest is truly empty and I wish I could back and have a few more babies to raise...I thought it was hard sending my kids off to college but this latest step feels too permanent ...I guess I just miss being the Mommy


Edited by AvalonBlondi (08/22/07 06:36 AM)

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#122884 - 08/22/07 03:09 PM Re: Rollercoaster [Re: AvalonBlondi]
Dotsie Offline
Founder

Registered: 07/09/08
Posts: 23647
Loc: Maryland
AvalonBlondi, where the heck have you been? It's great to see you again. Welcome back.

I'm happy for your daughter, but now I see what you mena by the permanancy to the emptynest. When they're in college, they are still in and out. You are now in the next life stage. Congrats and good luck.
_________________________
Founder Emeritus of Boomer Women Speak and the National Association of Baby Boomer Women.
www.nabbw.com
www.boomerwomenspeak.com


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#122885 - 08/22/07 03:55 PM Re: Rollercoaster
AvalonBlondi Offline
Member

Registered: 11/07/05
Posts: 1096
Loc: West Chester ,PA
Thanks Dotsie,I've missed you girls...so happy to see so many familiar names still posting here. As for the next life stage...I am praying daily for news that a grandchild is on the way...that is the next stage that excites me most.I cannot wait to join that club!!!
_________________________
Nancy

People may not remember exactly what you said or what you did...but they will always remember how you made them feel

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#122886 - 08/27/07 01:20 PM Re: Rollercoaster [Re: AvalonBlondi]
Dotsie Offline
Founder

Registered: 07/09/08
Posts: 23647
Loc: Maryland
Is that your son's wife?
_________________________
Founder Emeritus of Boomer Women Speak and the National Association of Baby Boomer Women.
www.nabbw.com
www.boomerwomenspeak.com


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#122887 - 08/31/07 04:17 AM Re: Rollercoaster
AvalonBlondi Offline
Member

Registered: 11/07/05
Posts: 1096
Loc: West Chester ,PA
No...my son is still single, but my oldest daughter will has been married for almost 4 years and is talking about
"trying" ...so I keep praying...:)
_________________________
Nancy

People may not remember exactly what you said or what you did...but they will always remember how you made them feel

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