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#120035 - 06/15/07 03:29 AM Re: Age Limits [Re: NewLeaf]
orchid Offline

Registered: 01/21/07
Posts: 3675
Loc: British Columbia, Canada

He is 31 and I'm not.

Just to verify why I have such a problem trusting women...there is this girl about 20 something who likes him. She came up to me outside and said you look your age today. She said, I'm just being frank and don't look as bright as you usually do and, by the way, how old ARE you. I said I'd have to be out of my mind to admit my age but, by the way, isn't it a shame that as tired an dull as I am today, I still look better than you! She loaded for bear now....I have to be very careful because now she confronts me in front of everyone and calls me "grandma" and makes comments about me being the same age as her mother. She keeps confronting me in front of the other girls trying to find out my age and making comments about my hair, my clothes, my taste in music, asks me what I do for fun...says they will have to take me out and party, etc.

I told them I don't go out to the clubs.

Now I find myself hiding out in my cubby and avoiding them.

At least

At your age, you can afford to be gracious to ....a 20-yr. woman. She's younger than my lovely, bright engineer niece, for Pete's sake.

So what if she knew your age? And so what if she called you grandma? Aren't you proud to be a grandma?

As for the guy, pfffft. Just another penis. I'm sorry. Penises are dime a dozen.

Get over it, NewLeaf.

No I don't trumpet my age at work, where 80% of the workforce are men. But I have mysteriously told several guys, I'm almost as old as they are....when they called me "young lady". I thanked them for the compliment and walked away in my wrinkled, baggy pants and librarian-like tie-up purple leather shoes. It is a construction site. And no, I have no (well, almost not much)cleavage and never will. There's nothing show to these men, most of whom are great, polite guys to work with.

Well, I'm not waiting until I'm 60 to feel confident. Life's good at 48.

Now, do I sound like a woman you don't trust?

_________________________ (How cycling leads to other types of adventures, thoughts)

#120036 - 06/15/07 06:38 AM Re: Age Limits [Re: orchid]
NewLeaf Offline

Registered: 12/26/05
Posts: 1066
Loc: Deland, Florida
No, of course not, Orchid. You sound like a great woman. I guess its hard to explain. I'm not ashamed to be a grandmother. I'm crazy about my grandkids.

I'm looking at singlehood though and for me, a feral woman, I've not yet reached your level of acceptance and resignation to being of a certain cronological age.

This girl for some odd reason, considers me as a rival and that rankles me. I'm not as gorgeous as Demi Moore and this guy certainly isn't Ashton Kutcher, but I can sort of understand their relationship a bit now.

I just consider it another facet of reality I'm just beginning to understand where before, I would have poo poo'd the whole idea of a much younger man and a much older female.

He is gorgeous on so many levels.

The girl I mentioned has no style, is bovine, unkempt, doesn't wear any makeup, and is as crude as yesterday's soiled sheets. Why SHOULD I cow to her insults and attempts to belittle me in front of my co workers??

There is a definite double set of standards in our society. Whether we like to admit it or not, we all have our own filters and we like to pidgeon hole people to fit our own preconceived ideas of what is acceptable and palatable and what is not.

Personally, I will continue to be myself with a certain coquettish innocence with a flip side of years of experience and expertise. If that threatens the likes of the twenty somethings at work....Oh well, then.
Aarikja Ann

#120038 - 06/15/07 07:27 PM Re: Age Limits [Re: ]
NewLeaf Offline

Registered: 12/26/05
Posts: 1066
Loc: Deland, Florida
She came up to me last night as I was walking into work and got right in my personal space and rearranged my hair indicating that it would bother me to have a hair out of place...!

I'm sort of giving up on my silly notion and high school crush on the 30 something guy. I mean, what would he see in me??? The movie with Jack Nicholson, I think it was Anything Goes where Keanu Reeves had a crush on the female star who was much older than him was a cute idea, but how often does that happen in real life?

I'm just fascinated by him like watching a rare specimen or breed of bird or wild life. He is on every level just what I've been looking for but way too late. He's smart, funny, swarthy, bearded but not too much, shy, sexy, tender, creative, always reading (Mark, he has deep brown eyes that twinkle and dresses in suede leather which smells absolutely earthy and spicy!!, sometimes.

Last night I noticed as busy as we were, he didn't come to work until about an hour before I left. I wasn't as light and happy. I went to break and came back and there he was sitting. He looked up at me and smiled from ear to ear. My heart jumped and I beamed for the rest of the night then drove home mentally beating myself up and listening to Mariah Carey...loud!

I'm on the rebound and I'll get over it without sulleying this very sweet and nice guy.
Aarikja Ann

#120039 - 06/15/07 07:51 PM Re: Age Limits [Re: Dianne]
turtle Offline

Registered: 06/14/07
Posts: 37
I would love a younger man. Just think of the possibilities. 35-55. It would be teach and your pupil have stamina too.

#120040 - 06/15/07 10:53 PM Re: Age Limits [Re: turtle]
katebcca Offline

Registered: 07/09/05
Posts: 631
Loc: Victoria BC Canada
Oh please don't make a fool of yourself like I did.
A younger man paid a lot of attention to me after I left my husband. He always complimented me, seemed like he was flirting with me too.

After a while I started to fantasize about him. I wondered if he really was interested in me? It sure seemed like he was. This went on for months and I finally got up the nerve to ask him if he wanted to meet for coffee. I do remember thinking if he was really interested he would ask me but justified it by thinking maybe he was shy. I even talked it over with some friends and they said, why don't you ask him out, at least you will know. He did say ok and we arranged a time to meet.

He called me an hour before we were to meet up and left a message at my home number, he knew I was at work. He said the coffee shop we had arranged to meet at was closed for renovations and that we would have to meet up another time, said he had made other arrangements now.

I guess my intuition told me to call the coffee place and sure enough they were not closed, nope, no renovations either. I still cannot figure out why he acted so interested in me but it was clear that he did not want it to go anywhere. He was about 28 or 29 years old, I was 41. Maybe I reminded him of someone, maybe even his mother :-(

Anyway, I felt so stupid. Even after that incident he still treated me the same way. I just couldn't figure it out but decided it was best to avoid him. I guess I'll never know.

I remember when I was younger (maybe 19 or 20) I met this older man on a train. We had a wonderful conversation for 3 hours. He seemed so sweet, grandfatherly like. He gave me his address when we parted and said he'd love to hear from me. He was interested in knowing more about how my life was going to turn out. I had shared with him that I was just starting college. I never did contact him although I felt that he was genuinley interested. Oh he was, but not in the way I thought.

He must have looked up my last name in the phone book and found my parents address. I think he had asked my name and questioned me about the unusual spelling of it. He actually came to my parents home 3 hours away from his home to see me. Just dropped by. My Mom called me at a friends house and I told her to tell him she could not reach me. Much later he started sending love letters to my parents house. Man did he get his wires crossed. Just goes to show, it works both ways. Don't ever assume anything. "It makes an ass out of you and me as the saying goes"

#120041 - 06/16/07 03:42 AM Re: Age Limits [Re: katebcca]
NewLeaf Offline

Registered: 12/26/05
Posts: 1066
Loc: Deland, Florida
Kate, how I know and that's just what I don't need right now. I'm not foolish enough to think he could actually be romantically interested in me. I think I just fascinate him. I'm unique. That's all I can say. He's not the only one who notices me. I've always been unique. I used to walk into a restaurant and all eyes would focus my way. I used to lean over to my date and laughingly ask if I had a parrot on top of my head. I draw attention like a magnet. My whole family does. Mom and dad just called it the Epps charisma. I'm not trying to and I don't have three boobs or anything, some people just seem to draw attention and I'm one of them.

I would never act on a crush anyway. If he ever approached me I'd probably go out for a drink or something, but probably not. More likely I'd introduce him to my daughters. They're all that and a bag of chips!
Aarikja Ann

#120043 - 06/16/07 09:39 PM Re: Age Limits [Re: ]
NewLeaf Offline

Registered: 12/26/05
Posts: 1066
Loc: Deland, Florida
No, she just walked up to me and started rearranging my hair! I was too shocked to do anything. Then later I thought of all the things I could have said or done.

I'll be ready if it happens again though!
Aarikja Ann

#120044 - 06/30/07 06:43 PM Re: Age Limits [Re: NewLeaf]
NewLeaf Offline

Registered: 12/26/05
Posts: 1066
Loc: Deland, Florida
He was waiting for me when I got off work the other night and walked me to my car. He is very shy and I could tell it was a big step for him.

He indicated that he was interested in me. I have to tell you I was flattered and it felt good! I know it can't go anywhere because of the age difference but he is the sweetest, kindest, most gorgeous guy with in infectuous smile and deep dark brown eyes.

I can have sweet dreams can't I?
Aarikja Ann

#120045 - 07/01/07 03:36 PM Re: Age Limits [Re: NewLeaf]
Dotsie Offline

Registered: 07/09/08
Posts: 23647
Loc: Maryland
Dreams only...
Founder Emeritus of Boomer Women Speak and the National Association of Baby Boomer Women.

#120046 - 07/01/07 04:47 PM Re: Age Limits
mrs_madness Offline

Registered: 09/29/05
Posts: 217
Loc: Moscow
I was visiting my daughter in the US a couple of years ago, she lived in an apt. with her college roomies. The apt. was on 'fraternity row' surrounded by fraternity and sorority houses a couple of blocks from the campus. I stayed with them for 8 or 10 days.

The balcony of the apt. overlooked the driveway and front yard of the frat next door. I like being outside and sat on the balcony a lot, watched the college world go by. Became familiar with the frat boys who went in and out all the time.

One of them began to talk to me occasionally up on the balcony. We'd chat and one day he asked me over for a beer. I said sure fine--but the girls were horrified. They said he was a very very bad boy (which I had gathered from watching the many girls come and go out of the frat as well), but why not? So I went over and had a beer with him.

Didn't take long before he propositioned me. Knowing he had girls out the wazoo I asked him why he would want to proposition an old lady like me? He said because those girls were so young and stupid and easy and he's never been with an attractive experienced *older woman* like me.

I felt like Mrs. Robinson. I was utterly insulted. He wasn't interested in me,he just wanted to see if he could take down a new and kinky unusual older women. I wanted to clout the brat with his floor lamp. I promptly left.

Younger men may show interest in older women, but she'd be a fool to fall for it. She's just another vanquished quarry on the stud's hit list. Just feeding his ego.

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