Hello dancer and all!!
I am 50 and doing the peri menopause 'thing'!
I am also a clinical herbalist and have been using natural remedies for over 20 years now for myself and clients.
I use wild yam cream and (when I remember!!) it works very well for hot flashes and mood swings. I also use calcium hydroxyapetite which, along with wild yam, should help reduce chance of osteoporosis.
I get both from www.newspirit.com (mention my name - Jenny McFeely if you do order and get $$'s off!) which is a company I keep coming back to for really high quality products (good prices too) that I can trust.

I have also found that when I take care of my liver (red beets, dandelion greens/roots, milk thistle and liver enhancer from New Spirit) I am much better too.
There are numerous specific herbs too like black cohosh etc but I believe in starting with the simple stuff first!!
What does anyone else use in the way of herbs that helps?