coming to an end

Even though I work full-time from home, I still see myself as a full-time homemaker. Anyone else in here do that?

Well, I'm counting down the days. Just like the way the kids count the days until school gets out. I'm doing the same. There are days that I can't wait, and days when I tear at the thought of this era ending.

When I'm doing load after load of laundry and the hamper is still full, I think YES...in another month I will be doing laundry for two.

Then when my daughter is lying on the chaise in our bedroom and I am in bed, and we are just talking about anything and everything, I think...I am SO going to miss this.

I'm up, I'm down. Please tell me this is normal!

This is so normal! My best friend is experiencing the exact same things right now. She will be taking her daughter to college in Arkansas in about two weeks. (They live in California)

They are excited one minute, sad the next, and cranky in between as they try to understand the separation anxiety and the feelings they are all experiencing.

I, however, still have both at home (19 and almost 15) so I'm more in the "when are you leaving?" mode...especially when the house is a mess and they're just sitting around on their computers - don't you love summer vacation?

Hang in there Dotsie - it will be an exciting adventure for all of you. And you're lucky to have such a good relationship with your daughter.

Kathy

Trust me when I say..................they come back.

Every life experience, every single one, has good and bad, pros and cons. Stay in the good ones, and let the other slide. Stay in the now...try to focus on NOW. It's all we have. Also try to NOT think on "whats to come." That's using time away from NOW and isn't NOW all you have? Whats to come will be here soon enough but NOW is what matters.

Enjoy the chaise lounge moments of chatting away an afternoon, and enjoy the laundry moments, too. Each have their place down memory lane...

JJ

My children were able to attend university in London and lived at home until they finished their degrees. It was an arrangement we agreed upon and was ideal as they were able to attend university without having to worry about laundry, meals, rent, and all other maintenance that they otherwise would have had to be concerned with if they had pursued their degrees at universities outside London. Living at home allowed them to study and finish with a first class degree.

My daughter qualified on a Friday and got married the next day. It was heartbreaking because she never lived away from home. That was when I went through the separation anxiety mothers go through. All of a sudden I was setting the table for three rather than for four and she was not there to wake up to or kiss and hug before bedtime along with the other things that mothers and daughter share. My son landed a job the day after he finished university and moved into his own place a year after he started work. We still have dinner four nights a week since his place is only a few minutes away from me. Their rooms are just the way it has always been when they were home but then again, both children still consider where I am their home.

It is most heartbreaking when children grow up and leave home. One sometimes feels so redundant as a parent because now, the practicalities of day to day tasks and decisions are now theirs to consider. I can only pray that the children I have nurtured with love continue to make those decisions with God in the centre.

I know my son is a wonderful husband and devoted father and their family is a happy and successful one but still sometimes I feel left out of the day to day happenings which is the normal way of life but still I was so use to him coming to me that now I feel left out at times, proud but not always happy I did such a good job of making him independent....

Dotsie the up and down feeling is normal. I have two sons, and they sort of broke the bonds between us in puberty. I guess that was nature's way of helping me let go; it's simply easier to let go of monster teenagers. (Now they are 30 and 28 and we have, thank God, loving relationships).
If you have a good close relationship with your daughter, I can imagine how hard it must be for you. Sounds like you've been spared from the monster teenage phase, and that is something to be super thankful for. You'll see, Dotsie, when the children leave the house, you will have more time for YOU. You aren't loosing anybody; (they're just a little bit further away) and you're finding yourself again.