Mental or Emotional Breakdown

A MIND IN TORMENT
Every human being has a breaking point.
It is part of the human condition.


Ask anyone who has had both a physical illness and had a breakdown, to choose between these two and they will usually prefer to endure the physical illness.

Distress of the mind is not just imagination or self inflicted injury. Nerves are the cause of the most distressing symptoms, anyone can bear. The mind in torment can vibrate, tense, twist and torment every muscle and every organ in the human body into a knot of the utmost pain. The agony is very real even if the cause is in the mind.

The bodily symptoms are only a small part however, of the suffering. Even worse is the restlessness and discontent of the mind, the sadness and misery of the mood which destroys all enjoyment of life.

The distress is seated at the very point of morale and self control of the individual, so that they have to watch every movement, every utterance until despite every effort they become totally self-absorbed just as their muscles twitch, so also do their sensations.

The nerve endings feel uncovered, unprotected, raw and super-sensitive. Eventually a cloud of misery falls down over the sufferer which further isolates them from everything they used to enjoy. The laughter of their children they delighted to hear, becomes a jingling torment. Their favourite music now assails them like a knife going through their brain. Their loved ones mean nothing to them. They are even beyond tears, beyond feeling, beyond thought, isolated in a personal world of terror. Segregated from all they used to enjoy their mind harks back to the guilt’s sorrows and fears of their past. These are relived again and again until they appear as recent as yesterday. Meeting friends becomes almost impossible because of the difficulty in concentration, the intrusion of morbid thoughts, the irritability and embarrassment of blushing, trembling hands and uncontrolled, unwanted tears.

“pull yourself together …… no one else can help you, you’ve just got to help yourself”.

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I have 4 more pages of info like this to help you as you undergo a breakdown. Let me know through this posting if you want me to continue.

This is a transcript of a tape from my dear psychiatrist

jday, very intersting. Please tell us more about yourself. I didn't see anything in your profile. DOes your psychiatrist know you are sharing this? I don't know if that matters...

Wow, Jday, I can see that there have been times in my life that I have been close to this, but never to that extreme...
I agree, that mental torment is the worst. That is exactly how I used to describe it to my husband but he never understood. I think mine was always more of "the dark night of the soul", as some saints have referred to it. It means having that torment, but still able to be caring and compassionate towards others.

It hurt my heart to read this but I would like to see the rest of this piece. Bless you.

Welcome jday and so we hear from another perspective, very enlightening.

I just went back and read this while I wasn't racing. WOW! This is amazing. I have never been this depressed so it's hard for me to relate. However, I know someone who was definetly this depressed and I wish I had read it a few years ago. My MIL suffered from terribly from depression. It explains so much. Thank you.

I pray you are well at this stage of the game, and if you are struggling...you are in the hands of a good therapist.

Jday, it was interesting to note this phrase in your post: "beyond tears." And this: "guilt’s sorrows and fears of their past." and this: "Their loved ones mean nothing to them." Put some of these words together and you get the phrase I wrote in my book that is the core of my story: "It saddens me beyond my tears that love was lost within the fears." Jday, I don't know who you are or where you came from, or what your motive is for posting. But I have been there and back. And so have a few others on this site, at least everyone knows someone who has suffered from debilitating depression. I don't know if I could take 4 more pages of your psychiatrist's words without remembering all too clearly how far gone one is during a depressive episode. I hope that you have received help and that you are not suffering thus. Love and Light, L

[ October 29, 2005, 01:04 AM: Message edited by: Lynnie ]

Would like to see the full transcript. I've been there and am afraid I'm heading there again.
Thanks.

Mamacat, I am so sorry you are experiencing grief. BWS is a good place to find support.