A New Beginning at 50's

I have raised a son, buried a husband, and given my service to all other family members in need. Now, I would like to take time for just me and if this sounds selfish, then I am. I seek a new location so that I can enjoy people and all the wonders that life has to offer. Moving will take much planning and considerations. I would love to move to Charleston, South Carolina seems as if the coastline is alwasy calling me, but an uneasiness seems to come over me...the not knowing. Some ideas or general advice would be helpful or just your moral support. Thank you!!!

Doddle50, Welcome to a great place and warm women to relax against. I'm sorry it took so long for someone to respond to you, but I think some of us couldn't get to the site last night for technical reasons.

Anyway, taking time for you after all you've been through sounds wise and timely. There are so many wise women here who will be here shortly to welcome you in and speak their insights and support. I hope you enjoy being here, and I look forward to hearing more from you.

Wow Dooddle,

What an exciting opportunity you have! A new life, a new journey! I don't think it sounds selfish at all!

Tell us more about your dream for a "new place". What would this new place be like, what would you do there?

Danita

Hi Doddle50

Welcome!

I think that new beginnings are a positive way of making a change in our life. And moving to a beautiful state sounds awesome!

Sometimes that's just the medicine we all need. A different change in scenery.

Do you have any family in S.C.? Have you been there before?

I would love to hear more about it.

Teresa :-)

I'm with the gals on this one. Charleston, SC is a fun place. My sister lived there for a few years and visiting her was a blast.

Do you get the uneasy feeling when you think of moving away, or just when thinking of moving to Charleston?

Thanks to all of you for such a great welcome to the forum. It warms my heart to know that the world has so many wonderful people.

Dotsie--- My uneasy feeling occurs when I think of moving in general, but I lone for a new change of life. Saling my home; locating a new job before I arrive all weigh on my mind, but I have put the wheels into motion by searching for employment before arriving in Charleston, SC.

Teresa--- I do have family about a 20 minutes drive from Charleston, SC.

Danita ---- Thank you for the moral support; my dream "new place" is a beautiful city with arts, theater, the coastline at your door; new people and new cultures. My soul lone for something new in my life.

Eagle Heart --- Thanks so much for the warm welcome and I will continue my quest for a new life. My heart felt thanks, again.

Hi ya Doodle50....Moving to a new place, starting a new life is wonderful. As far as having a job when you get there, not too important since you'll have ready cash from the sale of your home. You could rent a place for 6 months giving you a chance to get to know the area and where you might like to live permanently and find a job. Sometimes we merely have to grab the bull by the horns and DO IT! You'll always find negative people and reasons why you shouldn't but don't listen to them. Just do it and have a ball...Oops sorry forgot to welcome you. Welcome!!!

[ September 20, 2005, 11:40 PM: Message edited by: chatty lady ]

Doodle50,

welcome and let me add a vote of confidence to your move. At 42, I moved from the hometown I'd grown up in and lived all my life and moved to Canada to marry a wonderful Canuck. Left behind my dad, 2 sons in college and had just buried my mother. Was it scary? You bet! Was it the right thing to do? You bet even more...

I had raised my 2 boys alone for 22 years and helped take care of a sick mom for over 15 years and felt it was time for me! So, spread your wings, take a deep breath and go fo it! If you don't do something for you.....no one else will...

Hugs,

Mary

Awweeee, the coastline at your door. How cool is that? How refreshing! How beautiful!

When I open my door, all I see is desert, rattlesnakes and tumbleweed.

A breath of fresh air in Phoenix is like putting your head inside a blowdryer and turning it on HIGH. YIKES!

I love my city........but I do dream of living by the ocean someday.

I say GO FOR IT! Life is not a dress rehearsal. Take a chance......

Teresa

Welcome to BWS, Doodle50.

Doodle50 - I also welcome you and I understand completely about wanting to start a whole new life somewhere else. Two years ago, my husband and I discovered a beautiful town in SW Colorado. We had both lived in NY all of our lives (he's 47, I'm 46). We had no family there, no job lined up. But we did it anyway. We;ve been here for 10 months and it has been an adjustment. He's finally starting a business, I'm finally making some friends, and even though our older sons complain about this place every day, we know we did the right thing. Right now, I'm sitting on my front deck with my laptop and the beautiful San Juan Mountains are right in front of me. The weather is gorgeous, the people are friendly, the air is clean...I always liked the beach, too, but with all these hurricanes, I'm glad we picked the mountains. They are unmovable, reassuring and inspiring. God bless you, whatever yo do!

Hi Doodle50,
I understanding about starting a new life, too. I was married for 34 years and lived in Colorado; got divorced and remarried and we decided to start over in South Carolina. We live in Seneca on the shores of Lake Keowee and yes, I was scared to death. But I have made more friends here in less than 2 years than I had in the big city. We can drive to Charleston (though we haven't yet - that's another story), can drive to the beach but don't live close enough to worry about the storms; we are close to Greenville and Atlanta where culture abounds - and there is so much to do right here. This is the place for singles like you as well as old married couples, and we all interact with each other, have fun - there is a fabulous Newcomers Club (look up Newcomers of the Foothills on the Internet) - I could go on and on. Just let me know if you want more information! I'm new to BWS also - the world is full of new beginnings! I look forward to 'chatting' with you! Dreamer

P.S. I'm now sitting here laughing as I note how many of us, me included, misspelled your name! Sorry, Doddle50! You can call me Dreemer!

Doddle50,

HI! I am new here also. It is nice to meet you! The only way you will make a new, different, and exciting life for yourself is to do it yourself. You know no one else will do it for you. It is all up to you! Also, isn't the nerviousness part of the excitement of something as interesting and adventurous as this.

I do have some suggestions:
Write down how much cash you will have (apx.) when you DO move. If you can afford it, give yourself a deadline of X months to find a job. If you have not found one in this period of time, move. You will find something soon! Do not buy right away. Rent for a while, and consider locations, property taxes, resale value, just the size of house that is right for you now (if you do not need it for resale value, do not over size, you will be sorry, you gotta clean it LOL), facter in some for up keep and things going wrong i.e. plumbing and such. Compare that to condos, their monthly upkeep you have to pay (no mowing lawns and probably a pool and weigh room) against a house. If you need help, a financial planner and good real estate agent (hopefully both recommended by someone you know) in the area you move to would be a great help, just watch out and don't let him handle all your money. Be a hands on person! My advise from experience and what my husband says! LOL In NO way is it being selfish! Good luck on you move! OOO sorry this was so long! LOL

Doddle, if YOU aren't living YOUR life, who is?

I don't have enough room on this page to name the women who I've talked to that say, "Oh, I wish I could start over. But at my age?" Unless you want to perform a triple Lutz in the Olympics, what's age got to do with it?

Puleaseee...

Go for it gal. Translate that angst inside your gut to what it is...fear.

Louis E. Boone
Don't fear failure so much that you refuse to try new things. The saddest summary of a life contains three descriptions: could have, might have, and should have.

Break a leg...

JJ

Doodle,

In your "dreams" what will you be doing in your new place. Specifics, please!

Danita

Dreamer - Thank you for such sound information and your experience with moving here to the upstate of South Carolina. I must say where you have chose to live is beautiful country and Greenville and Altanta do have so much to offer.
I have lived in Ware Shoals for 36 years and now would love to meet new people (women and men) as friends to see the world from a different view......the other side of the horizon has always allured me; even in my childhood years......and learning new things keep the boomer's mind afresh. Again, thanks. I have just found a new friend.

Change can be scary. I work with battered women and usually the fear that overrides being abused is the fear of the unknown so I understand.

I'd make myself a deal...if you find the perfect job for yourself, it's a go. I do this all the time and it's amazing how it works out for my best. Charleston is just the bong!