Posted by: Di
32 years ago yesterday... - 11/15/07 12:53 PM
we lost our beloved mother to cancer. My older sisters were 22, 21, I was 18, my brother 16. It was life-changing for us all, needless to say.
Dad did not do well for a long time. He retreated and did not speak for many, many months. He did, eventually, go to counseling. But sadly, back then, we did not have "grief counseling", per se. I wish they did.
Mom was the breadwinner of the family, as Dad was blind with macular degeneration from his mid-30's. We had tough times after Mom's death.
The good that came out of this was I was able to go to college for free with grants. We had to pay nothing..but I'd rather have had my Mommy back with us.
Last evening, I phoned Dad as a "memorial phone call". He said he has dreams of Mom. That broke me to tears. There is not ONE day that passes my life where I do not remember something Mom did, said, cooked, etc. We are in communication with her best friend from back then. They were both young mothers at the time with "all these kids". Four of us, and she had 7. They used to cart us all, the "gang" as they affectionately labeled us, to amusement parks, beach trips, picnics, bowling etc. We had such fun and wonderful, wonderful memories.
To this day, I miss those times so much. Don't ever think that kids up to the age of 18 are NOT watching...they are!
My mother very much a "hands on" mother: participating in PTA bake sales; was a coach for our girl's softball league;
Took us everywhere and taught us so much.
She was a stay-home mom until Dad lost his sight. Thankfully by then we were pretty much grow up enough to take care of ourselves when we came home for lunch from school. (no school buses then and we lived a few blocks away)
Each lunchtime we always left us a note: T. P. D. J...love M. Often times her notes included what was in the refrigerator to eat, what dessert was waiting, or to "turn off the sauce". Don't know how she did it, but she'd leave the spaghetti sauce turned on low all morning and we'd turn it off. Amazing!
So, my mother, Sally Ann, is one that will live within me forever. She was loved by so many and a friend to all. Her joking ways and laughter permeated any gathering. She was a barrel of laughs and not too often you would find her very serious.
She and Dad were deeply in love...and they loved their children. They instilled in all of us to "stay together", as we have all these years. We all are close, even though we live so far apart. I phone Dad often...he will be 80 in February.
Mommy,
I wish I could crawl up on your lap and cry when I need. Recalling your dream for me was to be a Mommy with all those baby dolls I had, I wish I knew how you'd help me to cope with being a childless woman. It hurts often and I still need you so much!
Mom, .Nov. 23, 1931 - Nov. 14, 1975
You spent your "dash" creating and nurturing four beautiful children and imprinting a life-long deep devotion in the love of your life....Daddy.
I will always love you.
Dad did not do well for a long time. He retreated and did not speak for many, many months. He did, eventually, go to counseling. But sadly, back then, we did not have "grief counseling", per se. I wish they did.
Mom was the breadwinner of the family, as Dad was blind with macular degeneration from his mid-30's. We had tough times after Mom's death.
The good that came out of this was I was able to go to college for free with grants. We had to pay nothing..but I'd rather have had my Mommy back with us.
Last evening, I phoned Dad as a "memorial phone call". He said he has dreams of Mom. That broke me to tears. There is not ONE day that passes my life where I do not remember something Mom did, said, cooked, etc. We are in communication with her best friend from back then. They were both young mothers at the time with "all these kids". Four of us, and she had 7. They used to cart us all, the "gang" as they affectionately labeled us, to amusement parks, beach trips, picnics, bowling etc. We had such fun and wonderful, wonderful memories.
To this day, I miss those times so much. Don't ever think that kids up to the age of 18 are NOT watching...they are!
My mother very much a "hands on" mother: participating in PTA bake sales; was a coach for our girl's softball league;
Took us everywhere and taught us so much.
She was a stay-home mom until Dad lost his sight. Thankfully by then we were pretty much grow up enough to take care of ourselves when we came home for lunch from school. (no school buses then and we lived a few blocks away)
Each lunchtime we always left us a note: T. P. D. J...love M. Often times her notes included what was in the refrigerator to eat, what dessert was waiting, or to "turn off the sauce". Don't know how she did it, but she'd leave the spaghetti sauce turned on low all morning and we'd turn it off. Amazing!
So, my mother, Sally Ann, is one that will live within me forever. She was loved by so many and a friend to all. Her joking ways and laughter permeated any gathering. She was a barrel of laughs and not too often you would find her very serious.
She and Dad were deeply in love...and they loved their children. They instilled in all of us to "stay together", as we have all these years. We all are close, even though we live so far apart. I phone Dad often...he will be 80 in February.
Mommy,
I wish I could crawl up on your lap and cry when I need. Recalling your dream for me was to be a Mommy with all those baby dolls I had, I wish I knew how you'd help me to cope with being a childless woman. It hurts often and I still need you so much!Mom, .Nov. 23, 1931 - Nov. 14, 1975
You spent your "dash" creating and nurturing four beautiful children and imprinting a life-long deep devotion in the love of your life....Daddy.
I will always love you.