OMG... my mother in law Sonia has been tentatively diagnosed with some kind of cancer of the lip. Well, she's smoked for most of her life (she's 63), so she blames herself. Of course, for anyone else, I would just brazenly agree... but she and I are close. We share a lot of the same aches and pains, both physical and emotional, and she has been the one and only roommate I have ever gotten along with (Raul and I share a 2-bedroom with her).

I never got to see to my own mother off the planet, so to speak, although it killed me that I couldn't be there for that last duty / privelege... I was disowned! Now that I have been accepted as a daughter by my mother in law, it seems I will be called upon to help her in that way. I was always ready before, for my mother, but then I was not allowed... so I think the sense of needing to be there passed from me. But now I think I will be called upon to help Sonia... and I feel so damned unready!

Well, she still has to see a specialist about this... biopsies and so forth... so the story's not all told yet... but I just found out today... she told me before she even told her own sons... so I have come face-to-face with some kind of destiny here.

Help! I'm not taking this too well....

Love,
Lil