i have noticed that whenever i get together with my family and extended family, i suffer from a family hangover. i don't drink much . . . maybe a glass or two of wine . . . but some of my family members drink a lot and it ends up eating away at me. worrying me. i can't sleep thinking about them.

other family members are just irritating, constantly expecting to be waited on, complaining, or acting out in some way.

the bottom line is that i do not enjoy hanging out with my family. i do not like their company, for the most part, especially when anyone is drinking more than moderately.

there are also side arguments going on most of the time . . . some people don't understand that on holidays they should be o their best, not worst behavior. the tiffs between people kind of poison the atmosphere.

i don't think anyone is as uncomfortable with it all as i am. i just notice a lot of dynamics that are occurring and i also notice some people over-indulging. they say, "it's christmas," and then pour another drink. i do not know when christmas became equated with drunkeness . . . of course i do not say anything, that would only make things worse.

i am not a partier and i do not like to hang out with partiers. and there are people in my family who just bug the crap out of me, whom i would prefer never to interact with, but feel i have to on big holidays and i suffer a lot from it afterwards.

i guess this is a whine. i mentioned it because there is such anticipation for christmas and then there is the reality of some people's holidays that are less than nurturing or enjoyable.