Dear all,

I've been rather dissatisfied about my life because of my "zero" lovelife. I'm not someone who fall easily in love, and it seems like others do not fall in love with me too. The few guys I have ever seriously liked in my life all became my good friends, but they do not love me. And this repeated pain of unrequited love has eaten into me. I find it very hard to be joyful in God. Some other guys showed interest in me, but I did consider them at all because they are unbelievers... but my obedience to God has only brought me the gnawing pain of solitude, and the fear that I will never find someone who love me.

Today, I found that my best friend is attached. I know I ought to feel happy, but all of a sudden I feel that there is a big gulf between our worlds now. Hers is the blissful joy of love, while mine is one of perpetual disequilibrium.

I have been trying to be thankful to God in all things, but when I look at the failure of my love life (rather, its non-existenec), i find it takes more and more effort to be joyful...

I do feel that I need to be loved. And it would be very tragic if I'm not a single by choice.

Please do pray for me. I feel very weak and dry inside. Not to forget there are many deadlines for me to meet in school (I'm a postgrad student), but this gnawing pain is taking its toll on me. Please pray that God will have mercy and enable me to rejoice in all circumstances and to have strength to cope with my work.

Deeply in need of prayer.

Runner,

You already know that you are not alone...that God is with you always. Even in your pain.

To want to share your life with a significant other is very natural and will come. Just not eaily for you and quickly. When you least expect it, someone will show up that gets that heart thumping. You are an intelligent woman and you can rationalize all of this but you want to be in love. You know that is not a fault!!

Stay with God, ask him for strength and you will begin to allow love into your life.

And welcome to the forums. Tell us about Singapore and your life. Did you move there for post grad work?

Lynn

Welcome Runner and yes, please do tell us all about Singapore.

When I was single, something I noticed was when I stopped caring if I met the right man, men came out of the woodwork like cockroaches at night. There was something about my attitude that made them know I wasn't looking. That sparked an interest in them!

If you concentrate on you right now and finish school, it will happen. Maybe God knows a romance would distract you and He could have great plans for you and your degree so I would focus on that for now.

But know that I will be praying that you find happiness and in God's timing.

Runner,
God says ask and we shall receive. I belive this, and I can tell from your post you do too. Sometimes however, we ask God for something, then we take it back and try to force life to deliver. I am so guilty of this myself. Focus on the things you have in front of you, your friends, school, etc., and give God the biggies... then trust HIM to guide you. He will, He does, He promised.

JJ

Welcome, Runner. There is a sadness in your post that I can relate to, even though I am not single. But I am married to someone I don't love anymore, but this is not a legitimate enough reason for me to divorce. So I too, in obedience to God, feel sad that I cannot be with someone I love. It's a lonely feeling, and a guilty one as well. My husband is not a bad guy by any means, which makes me feel worse about it.
On another note, I have an old friend who lives in Singapore, who is also feeling lonely and confused. He is 46, though, I am assuming you are much younger?
Peace to you and again, welcome.

Thank you all, for all your encouragement, and your willingness to intercede for me... :1 Your sharing has reminded me about many things... Yes, I guess I should focus on what I have right now, and trust in God to lead me in this area of my life.

Lynn, I'm a Singaporean. I didn't move there. I'm doing my postgrad in Education, so I will be a teacher after graduation.

About life in Singapore... well, it's a never ending rat-race here... I guess it depends on your occupation as well. Professionals tend to earn a lot but they are grossly overworked. Others have more free time, but they earn barely enough to meet the high living expenses here.

University life is hectic too. Most of my friends who went on exchange programs to toher countries have trouble adjusting to life Singapore upon returning. They find it hard to adjust to the pace and workload. :S

Thanks again, so much for all your advice and prayer and sharing!! I really appreciate this so much...

Dear runner: I want to let you know that the Lord rejoices when we put our needs, worries, concerns and anxieties in his hands. Trust in the Lord. At times, when we think our prayer is not being answered, it is that he is preparing us to receive the answer.

Count your blessings! It will make a difference in your life and soul! Psalm 103:1-3

I trust he will lead you to the person he has for you and vice versa.

He created us to love and be loved. So I know he takes special interest in our life companion, if we give him a say in that matter.

May the love of God fill your soul with joy and gratitude and the faith that He is in control of your life.