BWS has been my second home for so long, I don't even know where else to go when something like this wants to be shared. Well, there IS no place else to go. And it's too painful not to share.

I recently reconnected with a former co-worker of my brother Gary. She told me that even now, 2+ years after he died, they have not touched his workspace...nobody has ever had the heart to move anything, and because of downsizing, they haven't needed the space, so they haven't moved anyone into that office. Apparently, everytime anyone walks by his office, they salute it/him.

This so made me cry. I'm not the only one who still misses him, and clearly not the only one who thinks he died way too soon.

What a wonderful tribute to your brother! He must have been loved by everyone.

I understand Eagle and realise how many areas one life touches.Workplace collegues are important and this story warms my heart
How are you these days ?

Thanks MA...her comment deeply affected me. I've been leaking all over the place.

How am I? Seeing more light than dark, feeling more positive than negative, and further along the road to creative and peaceful coexistence with the new realities. JJ's story about her Mom has been a major inspiration for me...early mornings are the worst time for me, but as soon as I begin to feel the sadness and despair, I leap out of bed, open the window and breathe in the new morning. I'm not quite at the point of shouting "good morning world" out loud (have to adhere to the bylaws here, you know), but I do stretch out my arms and greet God with gratitude for another beautiful day. That's a long way from where I was a year ago.

Thank you, Yonuh. He was deeply loved and still missed. We've also been discovering that many people have been having some very funny "Gary-moments". One of the qualities people loved most about him was his humour and ability to make people howl with delight and laughter. He appears to still enjoy doing so.

First, I can't believe it's been two years. It seems like yesterday when I sat in this same seat, posting with you about your brother.

How cool is that? I love how they salute him when they walk by. Must make your heart happy to know how much he was loved.

I can't help but smile thinking of your precious brother everytime I make sugar free kool aid for myself, which is daily. I couldn't wait to get new jokes to share with him each day. At night his name passed my lips as I'd pray. We wonder sometimes why the good Lord takes the brightest and best of us too early to be with him but really being with God is a reward, not a loss of some sort. Those people at Gary's work have made a shrine of his office to remember him by, and that shouts to the rooftops what a generous loving man he was. We should all be so fortunate to have other humans think so highly of us while here and gone. You must be so proud Eagle as you were his best friend besides being his family.

Thank you Chatty. There's hardly a day that goes by that I don't wonder the "why" of it. Somewhere along the way I gave up trying to figure it all out and decided to trust that Someone somewhere has it all in hand. It's either that or succumb to bitterness. I just have to believe that there's more going on than we can see, a bigger picture, and someday we'll know the why of it all and it will make sense.

Your kindness will always be a candle in my heart, bringing warmth and comfort everytime I think of your kindness to us during that time.

Eagle,
What an awesome tribute to your brother, Eagle. Wow! 2 years
and they haven't let anyone else have his office! Again, I say,
awesome!

How wonderful the memories of your brother must be. Someday we'll all know the why of it, I guess. I have said, "Why, God,
why?" Much and often, these last four years. But like you I don't want to be bitter. So I choose to believe, He's all knowing. And someday we'll have the answers. Blessings and prayers,

Eagle
I read a book this week a novel from my library by Douglas Kennedy.In it he writes as a Mother whose little girl is run over...her subsequent grief..it is so well written I wept.
the woman is mad with grief...flees..attemps suicide and the story of her recovery is suberbly woven by Kennedy.
I thought about you when it said that the loss had to be "accomodated" and that is subject for a thesis.

Its a hard thing that happened loosing Gary.You shared and we cared.Thank you for sharing and I remain on your shoulder whispering that you find peace..