In some ways it is saddest of all for the child at this time.

While the mother is not the best mother (Was my mother? No, she yelled at us alot and could hve praised us abit more often. But we turned out ok.), there is always the possibility she will become..a better mother in the future over time, via a very hard lesson at this time of her marriage when now the court is now involved. AFter all, unless I have misunderstood facts or don't know further details, the mother does not have drug addiction nor disabling mental illness that renders her not quite cognizant of caring for another human being.

What I am trying to say, does not diminish your role, EW at all. It is hoped that if little A. lives with you for awhile, that the arrangement will be open and trusting with the mother for visits, etc.

The child is aware of her mother and vice versa. There is already an established bond, no matter what the quality of the maternal-child bond is. As a daughter grows older, particularily if the child already looks part black,/Afro-American, it does help for her own identity as a woman conscious of her roots (she will become to be seen by many strangers and loved ones as part-black), to know of her mother in a positive way.

Before people here take offense, I say with acute knowledge that I have 2 sisters, who each have half-Chinese children because their husbands are Caucasian. For well-rounded, healthy children to grow into healthy adults in mind and spirit, it really helps the child as a result of biracial unions, know positively both birth parents. I see this in my 24 yr. niece and her 22 yr. nephew now.

The best example is famous now: Barak Obama. His own healthy sense of being an American citizen, biracial and comfortable in his own skin/identity.