I know how you are feeling Dotsie...my Mother said to me.."I want to live long enough to see all of your kids married and settled and to watch the look on your face the first time you hold your first Grandchild.."...she didn't live long enough for any of those things (I'm still not a grandmother and only one of my 4 kids is married)...so oftentimes I feel like I let my Mother down....and other times I feel so cheated going to so many happy family events without her...it weighs heavily...and I haven't found anything yet that helps ease the hurt....