QS, god love you, even though you might not have the closest of relationships with your Mom, it's clear to me you love her and take time to care for her. Bless you! I too would wonder why the brother isn't sharing in this and why they call YOU to set up or take her to appointments. Sounds as though you could use a break from that routine.

When Mom and Dad were both sick, my sisters and I shared the duties, all except one sister. There are five of us, so even though it was only four of us dividing the duties, it does help to know you will have someone to turn to, if needed.

Dementia test vary and there are different things the doc's do for testing. But it is essentially a process of elimination. They eliminate what the patient DOESN'T have, and then the brain scans, plus other test, can verify the dementia, if any.

Neurologist, not general MD's, are the ones who usually conduct the test. Also, in a lot of cases, the person is simply low on B12; thus the forgetfulness--not dementia, necessarily.

Hang in there. Sometimes it just helps to vent. I think there are a lot of people (I for one) who understand and appreciate your honesty about it all. Good grief...we are not superhuman and we have feelings. They don't all fit into a nice square box. So vent anytime you need to...we're here and listening!