Humlan
my adult daughter and I have a pact..never decide anything important on a Friday night.Add to that January.she and I have shared values.
When we air our concerns its like letting the birds out of a cage.Thoughts flutter.Be calm and the worries can be handles.
The grief of your Susan will always colour your life..but I hear a strong woman when you advise others.Passionate too.
R. has settled into a comfort zone..he does need to recapture some romance.Think about it anothermaole in the house..wonder is he isnt being argumentive..Your son needs space..being the wise woman you are you want to give hime this.Are you worried if he doesn't have space he will find it elsewhere.This feeling is the empty nest and it hurts.
When we were in fertile years we had hormones to blame.The ebb and flow forms such a big part of our identity.
Your job requires energy and insight..you are being recognised(your rise and the whiskey!!)
Can you explain to R. that you are feeling low...and even if he wont go to a film..light the candles and watch a whole movie..
you say his sons mother is restricted so he R. will have little experience of a strong woman who is as developed spiritually as you are.
Personally I realise that my husband understands me better than anyone BUT only because of having listened to me huffing and puffing on my high horse.
Allow R. to evolve.If he can understand children he can transpose their development into the adult domain.
Rest your weary thoughts Humlan...I care.
MA