I can't remember where I heard this, and I may not translate it correctly either, but I really liked it when I heard it - maybe someone else knows the actual quote and can say it better, but this is what I remember:

"There is never any justification for extinguishing someone else's candle in order to make yours shine brighter."

I know that for so much of my life I had such a difficult time, first, believing that I had a light worth shining, and second, actually daring to shine it out there. It's only because others encouraged me to shine, allowed my light to continue to shine and helped me to keep it shining bright that I was able to finally believe in myself and in the worthwhileness of each person's light, no matter how feeble it might seem.

So I cannot fathom going around extinguishing other people's lights in order to make myself feel better. Instead of preparing zingers (which my oatmeal-mush brain can't remember anyway, LOL) I try to remember to find ways to turn the situation around and draw out any flicker of light from the person, even if that sometimes means allowing it to overshadow mine. I can't always do it, sometimes I'm just too weary and hurt, but I figure there's enough darkness in the world today, we need to enkindle all and any flicker of light we can possibly muster...and then when we turn the zinger into positive energy, we're rippling more light instead of yet more darkness.

Not that I can do it yet...I'm more likely to just crawl home sobbing all the way...still, it's one way I try to counter my own self-esteem issues - by building up others instead of tearing them down.