My Disability ~ do you have one?

I thought I would explain mine.
I have broken my neck twice. The last time, recently, I
injured my spinal cord and nerves a bit, just a nick.

This cost me the strength and partial use of my left arm and both hands forefinger and thumb, esp. the left. You cannot see it to look at me and I can still dance but I must baby my left arm and if I write, type or use both hands where it requires my thumb and forefinger, it gets very tired and causes great pain. I am medicated for this.
I cannot lift over 30lbs and cannot stand or sit for too long. I try to ignore these things and constantly injure my arm and have to take extra pain meds. I cannot get it through my thick head that those abilities are compromised. If I don't answer an email or if I don't post, I am over my limit for my arm and fingers!
Yes, it's odd but it's true. It comes from injuring C5 - C-6

Does anyone else have a disability? Do you care to share?

dancer9

Oh dear dancer, there is nothing "odd" about this. What do you think is "odd?" How did you break your neck, twice? When was the last time? I bet it is so difficult for you to think that you can twirl and leap, but then all of a sudden you remember a limitation. It's amazing that you are alive and well, what with a broken neck x2. Your body must have been very strong from all the dancing to be able to recover as much as you have. Wow, what amazing strength and resiliency! L, PL

Dancer...thanks for sharing...despite your pain you contribute so much to these forums...I'm sorry for you injuries and pain. I'm with Princess...how in the world did you get injured twice?

I don't have any disibilities, thank the Lord. Just normal old age stuff and I don't like to complain...much. When someone asks me how I am I say "great!!! I'm six feet above ground and that's a beautiful thing!"

Hang in there...bless you, dear.

Yep, I do. My butt is too close to the ground. Imagine all the implications. This world wasn't built for anyone under, let's say, 5'4ish...

Please, dancer, tell us what happened - 2x - you are one heck of a lady!!!

Yeah, gimster it's true! I share that same disability....everything is made for giants, including my cupboards. Seriously speaking, my only setback other than normal aging is that I still have weakness on my left side left over from the stroke in '98. If I get too tired, I can have the foot-drop in my left foot. My left arm is nowhere near as strong as my right. And a little swallowing difficulty at times. aI take it in stride because I'm so used to it. I outdid my left arm this past weekend when I tried to rake snow of the roof of my side shed. When that quits on me I know I need to rest for some time to get it back. It's so strange really...with a stroke...it feels like it's actually your body giving out when it's really not....it's the part of the brain that gives out.

I have that dunlop disease. My belly has done lopped over my belt. And I didn't realize it till now, but I am also afflicted with that same butt disease. Don't you hate it when you walk and your butt hits the back of your legs? Ew.

Dancer, the more we hear of you, the more amazing you are. I am not making light of this post, just making light.

You are truly one amazing woman and I am like the others in asking, how do you deal with this and dance?

Dunlop JJ? You kill me woman!!!! LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL

jj, if you aren't a trip, I don't know what is!!!! I laugh and laugh at your posts. I've got PTSD [Post Traumatic Stress Disorder] and I guess others here, have that too.
The worse part about it is, I over react if startled. My nerves are uptight and I don't sleep very well. Some of that's aging, I suppose. I've got arthritis, but so does everybody else. My heart aches for those with diabetes. I know that's a meannie.
Prayers and blessings to you ALL...

My most disabling condition at this time is migraines. I had a very important seminar to attend to today. I was awake all night with a migraine. I took an Imitrex tab and an Imitrex shot, and still was not able to get to the seminar due to the pain and nausea. Sometimes I am literally paralyzed, as if glued to the bed, and cannot move. Like Meredith, I miss many days a month and many opportunities due to Migraines. I've been on and off every migraine med ever made. I've had other disabling conditions, including PTSD, but through therapy, medications, meditations, and the grace of God, I have achieved some amounts of healing. I know everybody has something because we have bodies! I have residual pain from the 5 surgeries for cancer, including bilateral mastectomies. But I'm here!

Sorry about your migraines, Princess! I have read in your book that you have suffered these almost all of your life.

THAT becomes a lifestyle. I would suggest, speaking for the American Pain Foundation, that you see a pain specialist just for the pain alone. There are doctors that specialize in only pain now and you are a canidate for one!

Pain, Princess, affects our immune system, blood pressure, heart, mental processes, and our whole being. Pretty soon we begin to live "around," the pain. You, I think, could take some control over your life with a better pain management program for them!

What do you think?

dancer

Hello!

What interesting posts and everyone seems to have a terrific outlook!

I have an inner ear disorder -- balance disorder, Meniere's disease, autoimmune inner ear disorder -- it's been called all kinds of things. I've had it since age 21 and it actually forced me to do work that I could do at home. Which turned out to be medical transcription, which is another story.

Princess, I totally identify with the migraines. Many of the symptoms of the inner ear disorder are similar to migraines -- headaches and nausea. Yuk! Did you know that neurologists are having a lot of success treating migraines with more medications now than they used to have available? Things have changed in the past several years.

Take care,
Diane

Hi Dancer, I did go to a pain management clinic, but I did not like the way they operated. Oh, they wanted me to do some kind of weird spinal thing. I've seen psychiatrists, psychologists, neurologists, endocrinologists, orthodontists, ear, nose, throat specialists, head and neck specialists, and drug dealers. Diane, thanks for the suggestions. I've been on all the meds. Topomax made me a crazy person, subject to attempt road rage for no reason. I heard (bad choice of words) of Menier's disease from a colleague who got the disease due to a cold. She wears hearing aides, which appear to be a pain in the neck for her. Dancer, you never did tell us how your broke your neck twice.

LOL, How I broke my neck, by Dancer;
When I was 14, I went flying down the bannister on my butt in highschool, taking the corner, I was famous for it. One morning, I tried it lying down and bam, I fell 5 feet on my head and neck first. I had a concussion and a fractured verebre.
OUCH

Then when I was forty some, a few years ago, I was playing with my son in my dance studio and I went flying up in the air. I could not decide whether to flip or come down on my feet when I crashed down four feet onto my head and my neck again, same place, same vertebre. If I had been any one of my dancers that I work with, I would have called an ambulance in a hot second but it was me so I got up and asked for some ice.
I walked around for about a week, having to hit ER's for X rays and demerol shots. As soon as I had an MRI, because I was having trouble walking and breathing and everything, the doctor called and said "get yourself in a hard brace and do not move until you are coming for surgery."

I had a disease there in my neck that had been causing me lighter pain for years that they said was muscle pain. It was pretty bad, but no one really checked it out...When I fell, I injured the area that the disease had settled AND I had crunched my vertebre again, right into my spinal cord.

After moaning and yelling by the chief Neurosurgeon at the University of Arizona hospital about hwo I could dance with the disease hurting me and that was amazing and how lucky I was that I did not die when I fell, both times, and how no one could have suspected because I was such an awesome dancer, he went in and tried to fix me with much ceremony and a bit of public watching him. I was a bit covered by the press because of who I was and my son's letter to the surgeon before my surgery, it was outstanding and he is gifted in the area of writing. My son wrote an open letter to all surgeons and it hit EVERYWHERE it was so intense. I should post it, lol.

And so I had the surgery and they tried to "rebuild me," with donor bone and metal. EXCEPT I am allergic to ALL metal, gold, titanium, you name it. SO, six months later I was dying of the metal. THAT got big and public and as soon as I saw the doctor, I was scheduled for sugery the next morning to have the metal out. SO ~ he cut my throat twice.

THEN I had a gland in my neck die, it could have been damaged from the surgeries but it had to come out. By now I was really getting to be a known enity in the medical field here.

An ENT cut my throat AGAIN and took out the gland. BUT, he accidentally left HALF of the dead gland in me that kept getting infected. NO ONE could figure out why my vitals finally were falling until the did an MRI on my neck and saw that he left half in! OH NO!

So, yes, another ENT cut my throat and took the REST of that dead and infected gland out of me and that was within the course of about 2 years. All of that time I was in and out of living vitals and no one could figure out that I, indeed, WAS allergic to metal, until they did a test, and that I indeed, DID have the rest of that gland in me until they did the test.

I was lucky, huh? And so I have four scars from having my throat cut and ladies, you don't KNOW fear until some surgeon that is a stranger is about to cut your throat! Not to mention mess with your spinal cord!

There was no way out, my best friend is a doctor. I had to submit.

And there it is. I am in recovery. You all are helping me recover and I'm making friends all the while.

Oh, and, I landed in Menopause, my period stopped, right after the last surgery.

Da*n it.

dancer NINE

Dancer, that is an intense story of pain. I cringe at how you write "cut my throat." And your a singer! What a way to phrase that. I can't believe all that you went through. I mean, I can believe it, but to go through all that and continue your career in dance. I'd be interested in reading what your son wrote if you are so inclined to post that. Plus you have a disease in your neck? And you're not even an Aries, which rules the head and neck! How did you heal from the fractured vertebrae when you were 14. As an active dancer, did you have to stay still in a body brace? Phew! What an ordeal. And you have such a good matter-of-fact attitude. You deserve lots of silk pillow covers and massages, that's for sure.

Hello!

Dancer, that is indeed scary. I especially would not want anyone messing with my spinal cord!

Princess, it does sound like you have been through the wringer searching for a treatment for migraines. I think the Topomax is the same as using Depakote for it, and the Depakote has the added benefit of -- I believe -- making you gain weight. Oh joy!

Have you read about the use of botox for migraines? Now there's another scary thought!

Take care,
Diane

Reading about others...I send my love.
I was injured by a student who was doing "horseplay" this meant I could no longer function as a school nurse and I was off 10 months before moving into teaching .I loved my job so I grieved for what i had set up and was doing.
I turned the experience into good by faciliating other to be care workers and taught special ed. needs students.
What I had during that 10 months.
23 hours a day pain. slept in a chair...mri and hospital visits.I have a spinal oculsion which meant my sacral bone was pushed into my pelvis. A chiropractioner made me as well as I could be.Arthritis set in..I cannot take pain relief I use a tens machine.Anti inflamatory drugs caused anaphylaxis.
Though all this I have been learning..a thing comes along you get round it..there are things to find out.It has not been easy but I am here and grateful.
Most of all I lost friends.The people who saw my inuries at school when asked to say it happened closed ranks.Were told to by "someone" I did get my pension early...I did get another career but one boys "horseplay" cost me dearly.
We get changes to redefine ourselves.One day I opened my bible and there was in the Psalms..about having a broken back...then meeting a GOOD chiro then finding out where my own strength was..One day I could not walk back to my car in town...I look around wondering who I could trust to help me..that was rock bottom.Pain is awful..so now I work at keeping as well as I can be,
I have been open in this message as the others have..so I am trusting that others understand .
During the pain...had I not had loved ones I would have sought death.I admit that.
As A trained counsellor I have learned some of the paths others walk on.I am still learningn.
Love Mountain ash

A couple years ago, I had such pain in my feet; the pain went clear up to my knees and I was in misery. I don't know if it would work for everyone but it worked for me. I walk four miles everyday, without discomfort. I had acupuncture on the bottom of my feet. And had those treatments from mid February until Mid September of 2004. The doctor had been an emergency room surgeon in China for 16 years; she now had her own acupuncturist office and taught classes at the University of Buffalo, besides. While I went for those treatments, I met people there being treated for various types of back problems; headaches; chemo treatment, assistance; to stop smoking; chronic, upset stomachs, etc., etc. I had acupuncture on my hip; it pains from arthritis; and on a deteriorated thumb joint. I had treatments on nearly every body part. It's expensive and not easy to withstand. But it worked for me and others, with varied ailments. All I'm saying is, it's food for thought. Someone in my life has migranes and I've suggested
he have acupuncture.
Prayers and blessings

thanks,Princess, but trust me,I "processed," it completely as I was going through it! I know better than to cover my feelings! It was NOT easy and it was a nightmare at best. Still, I'm alive, I can dance, I can sing, and all doctors were careful and said they did not want to compromise my ability to do both. In fact the neurosurgeon said he did the surgery so I "could make more dances," and the last ENT took 4 hours for a half hour surgery to protect my vocal cords and other nerves there! They were supportive as was my attorney afterwards!

It worked out and I will post my son's letter here, soon.

dancer

Yes! All true, true, true, wordscribe. It is so with Carbatrol also, another mood stablizer/seizure medication and Neurontin! All of which was tried on me before the big guns had to be brought out!
I worry for that pain, Princess. There has to be a way to make your life more pain free.
I have read your book. You have had this pain so long that it HAS to be affecting your choices in life and what you can and can't do! I would not give up were I you. PM me, or email me if you want more ideas!
dancer9

Mountain Ash, you are a dear woman,
I have the pain you have. The "choose death," if not for loved ones and pain relief.
Tell me, is your pain relieved now? I so hate to think of you suffering with our sort of pain that is worse than death.
dancer9

I wanted to add, Mountain Ash, that I have several TENS machines too but they have never worked for me!
Do you set yours low or high?
Do you leave yours on a lot or only when you need it?

Thanks,
dancer9

Gosh Ya'll,
We've got some serious goings ons here. I don't have any disabilities. But, I do have limitations, since I've had a severey broken ankle and a liver TX. I wasn't expected to walk right ever again or live (all within the time span of 5 years). But, I walk fine and I'm alive. Plus, I can't take anything worth popping for pain. So, I adopted the mindset that "Pain is 100% proof that I'm alive". when something hurts, it just has to hurt, "use it or loose it", so I will not give into my discomforts. I've found the more I do the better I feel and the more tired I get the better I sleep. OH, and that other thing, the "Vertically Challenged", got that too...5'2" LOL Now that, is a challenge..but I enjoy shopping for pretty step stools to have handy around the house.
QBall

dancer
I use the tens machine setting it until it "hits the spot" I bathe and wear loose clothing in the early evening.I have accupuncture from a splendid phsio and work on keeping this stable.
Mountain ash

Q Ball, A true confession: I have spent a life wanting to be short and blonde and cute instead of being tall, dark haired and "exotic," or "beautiful."
I am only now being called "cute," as I get older from time to time.
Still, the people say, "that is one beautiful woman," not "she is so cute!
I wanted to be cute so very badly!
It wasn't in the cards!
dancer 9

All are good ideas, Mountain Ash. You are reminding me of things I need to be doing to stay better off with my pain! I think I will rescedule my acupuncture and my massages!
Thanks for reminding me to be better to myself!
dancer

Mountain Ash, please don't consider this prying, but can you share the horseplay story? And, the part from Psalms that helped you?
I am so sorry that the actions of another caused you such pain, but physically and in regards to your career choice.
You are a remarkable woman... you do know that, right?

LJ, I don't know anyone who rakes and shovels the roof, with or without some disabilities from stroke. BR, why did you have the pain in your feet? And how does anyone walk 4 miles a day in upstate NY? It can get mighty cold there! I can't get in 1.5 - 3 here due to cold & snow. Or that is my excuse. Snow, wind, rain, sun....MA, you have such a good attitude about life and lessons, and lessons in life. QB, what is liver TX? toxicity? WS, yes, Depokote made me fat and stupid, and did nothing to relieve migraines. I believe I would benefit from regular massage.

Wow, dancer. Thanks for the details on your neck related injuries. Scary.

I personally knew 3 people who were disabled from childhood, 2 from polio and the 3rd from birth where she is considered officially blind...and hence, genuinely can't drive, ride a bike, etc. I also worked in a hospital for spinal cord injured adults who were bound to wheelchairs --for life. So I can appreciate dancer, the near-miracle that your spine was not injured permanently.

so I consider my minor problem with wearing customized orthotics for past 15 years very minor. I do have wear them often enough or I get foot pain within 15 min. of walking.

I go for many hrs. on snowshoeing, hiking and xcountry skiing. I do wear them on bike also.

Princess,
Liver TX, is Liver Transplant...sorry bout the TX, it's a common abbv among we liver folks. LOL
Dancer,
You seem to be a tall gal that is proud to be tall. So many tall women/girls don't stand up straight for fear of being too tall.I rather like being petite w/ dark blonde hair. It's fun to shock people with physical strenght of a much larger person. Plus, I think smaller women can pass off that 'ooops child like innocense when we goof up' w/ such ease. So, handy..LOL
Sincerely from my heart, If prayers & wishes could take away the pain from each of you, it would be gone. Because I Pray it eases for you and wish for the answers that would find you in total comfort.
QBall

It's been quite a ride, Orchid. The damage, the drama, the trauma!
I appreciate your post. I did not really bother to post what happened to me but I'm not sure why. I do have the disablity and am getting used to it daily.

Because I can no longer dance all day and stay on the move, I found computers, and forums. This is why I am pleased to have found everyone here. I can sit, (although I am not to sit or stand for more than 30 min. at a time.) and write to some women who have a lot going for them and whom I can relate to when I am not on the move.

My injury put me on the computer for the first time!

dancer

QBall,
It's funny you should say what you did about strength! I am very small boned and not very strong at all. I am fragile and in fact, one of my son's gave me an engraved medical bracelet that said, "Fragile," on the front! I can stand next to a woman my height and she seems to dwarf me! My bones are SO small that I feel like women my size can pick me up and break me!
Here I am a World class dancer, so they say, and I'm a weakling, I'm the first to admit it! I make up for it with my verbage! LOL

dancer

Dancer
you wonderful person.seeing the positive.That your injury "put you on the computer"
For me it was that my daughter took me to a health spa.A one of where the spiritual was attended to.and water took a big part.Both deinking it and in therapy pool.It was there Imet t physio who did and still does accupuncture.I continued to visit for eight years.ay sneeked in to my life and a week at a time.
So making the injury into a positive is a step in a good direction.
Are the forum is blessed with you dancer.
Mountain ash

Foot in mouth, disease...

Dancer,
I worked 10 years at a company, where the owners expected their employees to dress up. I wore high heels for 9 hours a day. Then I retired and wore sandals, sightseeing on vacations. I believe, the drastic change caused fallen arches, and consequently, intense pain. It's better now.
Upstate NY doesn't have the winters we used to have. This year, we've only had two days in the teens. The rest of the time, it has been twenties and thirties. And we've had little snow. I love it!

Thank you so much, Moutain Ash.
I've not been on a computer long as most so it means a lot
to know I am welcome here and I feel good about everyone here as well.
And your writing is splendid, do you feel like writing another descriptive piece?
dancer

bonnierose,
That is hard on the feet and legs! I had surgery on my feet three times! I dance in bare feet but wear heels. When you dance on your toes it can do the same number on your legs and feet as heels all day so I know how it must have felt.

I finally went off pointe (dancing on my toes,) when I literally started to POP veins in my legs while on pointe!
It was a disaster, all of the sudden I would pop a big purple vein and it would spread like a bruise and scare everyone!

How are your legs and feet?

dancer9